Not the Plan

Lined up the babysitter.  This is the first hurdle.  Will the babysitter actually show up for a second time.  And yes she did.  I think we have a babysitter.  Yay!
So the plan was maybe a trip up to Paradise Point Park to check it out.  I have never been there.  I had also heard there were some pretty cool gravel type pits up Larch way that would have been interesting.
As my life is always reminding me......nothing ever goes as planned.  And so I spent the afternoon with my mother.  This was the back up plan and I thought we would get her a new cell phone.  Ha.  That part of the plan didn't work out either.  But we had a nice lunch at the Hockinson Cafe.  Dropped some boxes off at Goodwill, fed Betsy and Monster, and went to Walmart.
We had a good afternoon and I am finding that those are getting to be fewer and further between.  As I dropped her off she was again thanking me for all I do and how well they take care of her at the assisted living place.  So different from the last time when I don't do anything right and she hates it there.  Day to day is never the same and always a roller coaster.  Grateful for the good day we had today.

Farmer's Market

It was the last Farmer's Market day in Vancouver to get WIC vouchers for this year.  So we definitely had to go.  This was a much better trip.  The littles got lots of play time.  They got balloons from the balloon guy.  They met dogs, naturally.  The Hawaiian Festival was going on and we watched a bit of that.  We bought peaches and cherries.  It was a really nice morning.  The weather was nice.
We will have to plan one more trip to use up the rest of the vouchers that we got.

Friday Movie in the Park

All summer it has been in the back of my mind that we should go to one of the free 'movies in the park'.  So tonight we headed up to CTC Park and watched "Inside Out".  It was cute.  I hadn't seen it, but naturally the littles had.
We got there about 45 minutes before the movie started.  Got a nice spot where we could all see the screen.  The littles ran and ran and ran.  Playing and meeting dogs.  And then right before the movie started people came and set up their lawn chairs right in front of us.  Totally blocked the view of the littles.  We moved.
It got a bit breezy and the kids got cold so we left just before it was over.  They told me how it ended and that was good enough for me.  We did enjoy it and it was a free activity.  We'll be doing a lot more of those.

Planned Long Days Over

Yay!  I survived the second week of long days.  My feet complained.  My knees and hips complained, but we survived it.  We worked really hard this week.  Got all the returns done except two.  Lots of freight started coming in.  We got almost all of it done.
We were working hard on getting as much done as we possibly could.  Next week it goes down to just Liz, Brenda and me.  We are so sad to be losing Belinda, but we are happy for her and her next adventure.
So next week is fives, although Liz said she may ask for more hours as needed.  Guess I'm going over  hours in August also.

New Point of View

Struggling with Mom.  Something has to be different.  So I started looking for an online support group.  Found one and on it it was suggested that videos be watched on youtube by Teepa Snow.  Oh my gosh.  The woman is so smart.  I have a lot more watching to do, but I felt like it has changed my attitude already.  Because this like everything else.....the only control I have is over myself and my reactions.
I'm doing the best that I can, but that doesn't mean that I can't learn new things.  And that is where I am going.

Mike

So we work with a guy named Mike.  He works the technology desk.  Now he is overly friendly.  Like maybe he is trying just a tad too hard.  But that's okay we all adapt to our surroundings.  He is nice enough.  Very helpful...always getting doors and whatnot.
The littles and I ran into him a couple of months back shoveling some dirt for some raised beds.  It was out of place and put me at unease.  I'm just that way.  About that time at work he started using cutesy names for people at work (or maybe just me).  Anyway he kept calling me the warden. I don't know if someone clued him in or whether he realized it didn't have his intended reaction.  I have never had a conversation with him about any of my life.  So he changed it to trouble, but the unease was just there and not going anywhere.
Finally something changed.  Last week we actually had decent conversation and he just calls me by name now.  Then this week he did a shoulder thing and teased me that the day was almost over.  Now again anyone who knows me knows not to touch me.  So I saw he was going to do it and I tensed up for the flinch.  And the flinch didn't come.  Wow.  Maybe I'm actually outgrowing it.
Anyway I'm glad the unease is gone.  We'll see how I feel next time we run into him in our neighborhood because it is likely to happen.  He knew the people he was shoveling dirt for.  And in all my stepping I have seen his bike there several times.  But better to have friends, than to be uneasy.  At least it wasn't the hair standing up on the back of my neck uneasy.  Just uncomfortableness.

Whistling

The little man has been trying to figure out how to whistle.  I'm not a very good teacher.  Anyway the little woman comes running to me and tells me that he is whistling.  He comes out and acts all shy and embarrassed.  But yes, yes he is whistling.  Not loudly, but it is there.  Another skill and one he is so excited about.  He even had to tell Daddy about it on the phone.

"The Secret Life of Pets"

We've been planning on seeing "The Secret Life of Pets" ever since we saw the first trailer. This was our weekend to do so.  Originally we were going to do it on Friday, but we ended up getting "Sunset" (kitten's current name) instead.
It was wonderful.  I laughed and laughed.  Some of the jokes went over the littles' heads which is always a sign of a good animated movie.
After the movie we hit McDonald's and then home so they could argue some more over whose turn it is to hold Sunset.  At least Phoebe is getting a break from all the brouhaha.

New Babysitter

Trying again.  Katelyn came today for a trial run on babysitting.  She was here for a couple of hours.  She said the littles behaved until almost the end when they got into a fight over the ipad.  Ah.  Yes.  Life was easier when there were two of them.  ;p
The littles said they both liked Katelyn.  So now the test comes when we need her again.  Seems we can get a first time out of all the ones we try.  Then they flake out.  I get the feeling this one won't.  Got my fingers crossed.

A Cat of Many Names

We have been talking about a kitten for quite some time.  It finally felt like the time was right.  But we had to wait until after we got back from vacation. So we got back and every day I heard the cries of when are we getting a kitten.
The criteria for the kitten was different for each of us.  Audrie wanted a little tiny kitten.  Ha.  Yeah that wasn't going to work.  I wanted one about three months old or so.  It had to be big enough to defend itself from kids and the dog.  My criteria was it had to be black or creamy.  No orange.
Well I found both on the same day.  We went with the black girl.  So far her name is Kitten Rosie.  I'm sure that will change a dozen times before we settle on one.
We stopped on the way home and introduced her to Mom.  Mom fell in love I think.  And what is not to love about an adorable little baby girl cat.
The dog doesn't  like her and wants to eat her.  She doesn't like the dog.  I'm sure they will find a mutual understanding.

Tears

The little man looked at me and then asked why I was crying.  I wasn't but my eyes had filled with tears.  My everfilling and overflowing plate was just too full.  And there are things in their life that they are missing out on and it makes me so very sad.  I didn't have an answer for him, so he made his own.  He thinks I was crying because Papa died.  Maybe that too, who knows.
I was going to say I never cry, but I do.  Once in a very rare while.  Takes a lot to make me cry.  Like an overfull plate with children missing a lot of things.  And I have no way of explaining to them that the only uncle in their life is Pat.  Why they only got to see Nana Nita for an hour in 2015 when she only lives two hours away.  Aunt Tracy tries to see them when she can.  Why Mommy was ready for them to leave a day earlier than planned and tried to make that my fault.  I can't explain the loss we feel from Papa, other than that is how life is.
So while I feel sad about all those things and more, I don't explain that to the littles. Right now they don't know they have all this loss in their lives.  They don't have anything to compare it to.

Figured Out

I had to call the state today.  Since our daycare provider is not opting into the voluntary program the state is offering, the state is no longer paying for daycare of children not in school.  I have done my research and there is nothing in BG that meets our needs without trying to scam the state.  And when that came crashing down I would be the one in trouble.  So it isn't happening.  I got a notice about the termination of payment, but it included both kids.  Audrie is in school so the new law should not affect her standing.
After being on hold I finally have it down to I pay for Connor and they pay for Audrie.  The woman was very sympathetic and told me this wasn't helping me in the least.  I agreed.  The law leaves no exceptions, even in cases like mine.  I am greatly relieved for the help on Audrie.  Otherwise August was going to cost about twice my paycheck for daycare for both of them.  Now I can plan on $450 a month for Connor and they will pay the little bit (after Aug) for the few days a month she would be before school care.  And in thirteen months I can get him back on the case.  It will just be a tight thirteen months.

One Day at a Time

Ran into Sandi today.  She, too, is dealing with a parent with dementia.  She commented on the never knowing from day to day what you would be dealing with.  Good, bad, indifferent, lost, angry, etc. Here is what I know....you can't rationalize with a dementia patient.  And the dementia patient only sees their angle when they are in the middle of a derailment.  And its really hard to take a step back and not feel bad or angry.
My mom got very upset when we left the other night when she was derailed.  It wouldn't do anyone any good if I overreact, so I chose to leave.  It's hard to have this disease do these horrible things.  I know it is not my mom, but the disease saying the angry things.  And that isn't to say that sometime she isn't rightfully angry.  It's just sometimes she has the emotions of a four year-old.
So one day at a time, just like normal.

Back to Work

Back to work, back to routine.  The morning went all right.  We are still on Midwest time so the  littles woke up easier than they normally do when I have to work so early.  That helps.
Work is quiet.  Many of my co-workers are on vacation this week.  Everybody trying to fit it in before we start the gear up for fall.
It is a sad day.  Belinda gave her two weeks notice.  She is moving on.  It surprised me and probably shouldn't have.  She and her husband just bought a house.  And when we are slow at work it has to really show in her paychecks.  So she is moving on to the Red Lion.  Wishing her great success at that.
I got all the things done on my list that Liz left for me.  Sure hope more freight comes the rest of the week or it will be a long week.

Bits and Pieces and Forgotten Things

In no particular order.....

They honk a lot in Chicago, but they don't run red lights much.

Denise was telling us of the continental breakfast the Hampton Inn served while on their stay in Illinois. Sausage, waffles, eggs and the usual faire. When I stayed in Galesburg I also got a continental breakfast. Cereal, toast and vending machine pastries. A long way from hers. Course I stayed in a Super 8, and didn't spend as much as her.  You get what you pay for and I only needed sleep.

I'm amazed that Helga is babysitting her great grandchildren. Maybe it keeps her young and of course the kids go home.

I had the best night sleep in that king sized bed in Galesburg.
My camera got really wet in my walk in the rain. Still working but isn't zooming. Fingers crossed that it snaps out of it when it finishes drying.
My GPS is crazy.  I did more touring. I have no idea how it 'chooses' which directions to give me. Doug called me three times when I was heading to the fish fry because it was taking me so long.....gps started me on that road miles and miles before people there would do so. Every place I went in Illinois, I swear I went a different way. No wonder why I never knew where I was.

On the Way

We did spectacularily.  We went with two backbacks and came home with three.  Me, who is packing challenged managed that.
We spent some killing time in oasis's along the freeway.  My phone lost pictures along the way so the one of the kids watching the freeway is gone, but it was pretty cool.
We arrived at the airport with about five hours to spare.  Our seat assignemts were in the front of the plane since we were so early.  We just played around at the airport.  The kids met a woman from Michigan who was on her way to Minnesota.  They talked about cats and looked at all the pictures of her cat, Martin, on her phone.  Some guy told me I needed the little man to be twins.  Guess he had watched us for awhile...and the little man was full of energy.
Felt good to get on the plane and go home.  Pat picked us up at the airport and everything went mostly smoothly.  It was a good vacation.  Our thanks to all of those who made it memorable for us.

Back to Kokomo

When I woke up I was too sore from the twelve miles I had walked the day before.  So I skipped the aquarium and headed to Kokomo.  The plan was to spend the night and then leave for the airport late in the afternoon on Saturday.  Cassie had texted the day before asking what time I was picking the kids up on Friday.  My answer was I'm coming on Friday, but our flight isn't until Saturday. Well upon my arrival she packed up the kids stuff.  We atayed until David got home, who was surprised we were still there.  I don't need more than three hints, so after that the littles and I headed back in an Illinois direction looking for a hotel. Found one just before the Illinois border which made me happy.  Any closer to Chicago would have boosted the price a lot.  So our visiting was done.

Falling

The whole time I was on the back of that motorcycle I wanted to play with Doug's hair. He has really wavy hair and it is long right now. Doug and I are friends. Our friendship does not include benefits. We're friends. So then why do I want to play with his hair?
I became very uneasy and had to return to my aunt and uncles. Doug didn't do anything different than normal. So this change was just in me. I'm afraid of falling in love. We are so different even if we have a lot of similarities. Neither of us is looking for that.
Oy.

Chicago

After the rain yesterday my shoes gave it up. Turned out they were on their way anyway. So my first order of business was to find some new shoes. In my touring yesterday I know I saw a Target. I started walking and was having no luck finding it. I stopped a man with a dog and he pointed me in the right direction.

Found the Target and bought some shoes that were on clearance. Got to love that. And they are squishy. Hoping I have lucked into a pair of shoes that don't hurt my feet.
The Art Institute of Chicago was filled with more art than I could take in.    I decided I was old when I realized I really didn't care for the pictures of people duct taped to a wall. I saw some art I liked and some gave me a headache. There was one Picasso that I loved and would hang on a wall. I'm absolutely sure I see a cat in it.
I spent time in the garden of the institute. I also watched performance art of the man sitting at a table who will just look at you if you joined him. I've seen a similar thing on YouTube so I knew what it was.
I walked a lot.  Moved my car to a new parking lot and checked in at the second hotel. More money gets you chocolates on the bed, more shower amenities and a baby Keurig with k-cups for morning coffee.
Wound up the day walking down to Navy Pier for dinner. Mexican with a margarita. Then the nice longer walk back. Good night Chicago.

Walking in a Thunderstorm

I had a great morning with Wayne, Helga and baby Kai. Frank came and said good bye. I just love my aunt, uncle and cousin so much.
Made the jaunt to Chicago. Found the traffic. The last eight miles took me a good hour. And my GPS did not work well in the skyscrapers. I did finally find the hotel and parking. Got settled in and found a map. Plotted things out a bit. Then headed to the Willis Tower for the sky deck.
Once there I could buy a combo pass for $45 that gave me entrance to the sky deck and a fast pass to the Art Institute of Chicago. So I did that because it also saved me a couple bucks over the normal single prices of the two places with no fast pass.
That is some view from up there. I stood on the glass deck and looked down. One hundred and three stories high. Incredible. And then the thunderstorm hit. Lightning. Absolutely gorgeous watching the storm come in.
Now I'm not driving in Chicago. So I had walked to the tower and that meant walking back. Got my ten thousand steps in for the day. A lot of those were in rain and more beautiful lightning. I just hoped the buildings were tall enough that they would take the brunt of any strikes. Only one was super close. I looked like a drowned cat when I got back, but it wasn't cold, just wet.

Visiting Day

Spent the day visiting. All day with Wayne, Helga and Emma. Emma is Wayne and Helga's great granddaughter and she took a liking to me after she got over her shyness. My little man would have loved playing with her. 

I fit in a visit with Vern and Dorothy over in Belvidere. They are older cousins and doing well in their 80's. We looked at her garden and all her flowers. Heard about all her kids and grandkids. It's always good to see them.

Helga fixed a nice German meal and added corn on the cob. Who knew I like brats. We had white ones. Now I'm going to have to try and replicate her zucchini and tomato dish. Delicious.

After the sun went down I fit in a good walk.  It is very humid here and I'm not getting my steps in. Going to have to make up for it in Chicago.

Today was really the only slow day of my vacation. 

Two Thousand Miles to Ride

I've waited seven months for another ride on a bike. I still think it is funny that I had to travel two thousand miles to do so, but that is what happens when the babysitter is in Indiana.
Our day started at about ten. Doug figures we put a good two hundred miles on. Made a big loop. We stopped at Nauvoo, which is a Mormon town showing how they lived in the late 1800's. I'm sure it would have been more interesting if it hadn't been 90 degrees with 70 percent humidity. We rode along the Mississippi River. Saw some really cool porches. Saw lots of corn and soy beans. We had a late lunch in Monmouth at a place called Petey's. Super big plate of nachos and a big plate of onion rings.
After our ride we stopped at his cousin's. Instant like and when we left there was no shaking hands....that was a hug. People who know me know that that doesn't happen often (unless you are a child). I'm working on it though so I didn't flinch a bit.
We had to swing back by one of the schools Doug showed me the day before. I wanted a picture of the 'adopt a highway' sign. I'm sure CATS stands for something else, but I liked it. And then it was time to head back to his parents.
They live on a lake. So we went on a pontoon boat ride around it. Yes I rode on a boat on water. The water was calm and the boat ride smooth. No motion sickness at all. I heard some great stories and enjoyed myself.
I had the best day since Belinda's wedding. It would take a lot to compete with that day. Thanks Doug for making that so. It was a grown up day.



And then it was time to go. I needed to go back to Wayne and Helga's. Tomorrow is my only day with them sans kids. And I have some emotions to try and process. I don't do emotions so I have to figure out where they came from.

Kokomo and Beyond

The littles and I got up really early and headed to Kokomo. Their mommy made it home and it was time for them to be with her for the week. The littles slept almost the whole way which made a quiet ride. I paid ten dollars in tolls.
Upon arrival Cassie gave me a tour of her house and then I was on the next leg of my journey. Four and a half more hours to Galesburg. I missed the fish fry at the farm, but got to watch the end of the target shooting. I helped pick up shell casings and could tell that a few dollars got shot up. It was great meeting my friend Doug's family. Down to earth people and welcoming.
After we went to his parents' house, his aunt had to make sure I knew what a good guy my friend was. Wait...what? I know he is a good guy. At my age anyone in my life is going to be good people. I don't have time, nor energy to deal with anything else. I was just glad it was a brief part of our conversation because it felt like the conversations I've heard my mom have with my brother's friends.

Paddle Much? Busy Day

The kids needed to expend some energy, so we went to the Belvidere Park. The kids played on the playground. I let Frank know we were there and he came over. He went to the boat dock. We had to cross the swinging walking bridge. The littles weren't too sure of that. We walked up river and saw Frank on his paddle board. We met him at the boat dock.
He had life vests for the kids and got them on. Then he set about convincing the little man that it was all right. Connor was scared. Later he said he was afraid of drowning like Audrie did in the pool. Ah. But he conquered his fear and rode the paddle board in the river. She was ecstatic and loved it. She did cannon balls off the board. They totally got worn out and Frank had a good time too. I was proud of all of them.
Then we had the big family dinner at the Hoffman House. Everyone had prime rib and it was the best I had had for a long time. In attendance were us, Wayne, Helga, Barney, Denise, Russ, Charity, Patti, Rick, and Frank. We were a good sized group. The little man was convinced to try chicken noodle soup. The little woman ate French fries. Hers and half of Frank's. Wonder when she will outgrow not eating. Frank was in charge of Connor. The littles love Frank, but what's not to love......he is still a kid at heart.
Afterwards we took Frank home and found some ice cream. There was a car show going on and old cars were cruising up and down the street. Audrie said she didn't like old cars, but she was pointing some out. Connor loved it.
Thanks Wayne and Helga for the lovely meal and Frank for the day's entertainment.

Denise

My sister, Denise and her husband, Barney made it down here. They came over to Wayne and Helga's for the afternoon. We had a lovely visit. She brought me a new pair of earrings. :)   We heard some great stories of the farm and family.

After visiting, the littles and I went back to their hotel and got in the pool. The kids had a blast. Audrie went past where she could touch and took in some water. I think it scared Connor more than her. They were fascinated with the hot tub, but it was very hot. Denise went in it for a bit. Barney didn't join us in the pool, but he watched us play from the side.

It was the littles first hotel pool. Bet that was a mistake. 

Fireflies

I had forgotten about fireflies. We enjoyed them in Minnesota two years ago. The littles had forgotten that. So they spent a good half an hour chasing fireflies. The little man caught them easy.  And then aunt Helga showed him how to squeeze them so they would light up. They didn't hear the stories about the kids squishing the bugs to paint their faces to glow. I'm sure if we were here long enough they would figure it out.

Buses, a Train and a Plane

We had the best adventure for the beginning of our trip. We had a really late flight and didn't have anyone we could ask for a ride. So we caught the bus to the mall. The driver was especially helpful. I was able to buy a transfer pass which took us all the way to park rose transit center. He also told us when to get off to catch our next bus which shaved half an hour of our trip. once at park rose we caught Max. Got off at cascade station for dinner.
Then it was back on Max to the airport. Found out where our gate was and started working our way there. We had lots of time.  We met a vet who sent us to the tunnels for some running around without disturbing anyone. Each kid found a shopkin and thought they were blessed.
The plane was late.  Once it arrived everything moved pretty quickly.  We got on,  settled and asleep.

Fireworks

I guess it doesn't work in Mom's neighborhood the way it works in every other neighborhood.  The kids and I went outside to throw their pop its and burn some sparklers.  John, the neighbor a few houses down sent up something that must have had fifty parachutes come out of it.  It was really cool.  And what it did was brought my two and one other neighbor boy down to his house to collect parachutes.
About that time I thought I should introduce myself to him and I did.  We discussed his generous nature in decorating for Christmas.  The man goes all out.  And apparently he does the same for the fourth.  He had several hundred dollars worth of fireworks.  He had a tote about 3/4 full of mortars. The littles were enjoying all he did with smoke bombs and what not.
I was doing laps to get my steps in and I came back around his house.  His wife and guests must not have known I was there but I could hear one of the women as plain as day tell Audrie to go ask her mom for pop its.  Now obviously Audrie asked if she could have some and the woman could have just said no.  I heard Audrie reply that she thought we were out.  So I called her and Connor back to our house.  The woman did not want extra kids around.  That was all right.  We had a nice view from our own section of the sidewalk.  We threw the rest of our pop its and did the sparklers. We shared a sparkler with Nathan because he had stood at John's house while the three girls there did some of their sparklers in which they had twelve boxes minimum.
Next thing I knew the girl who lives with John came to ask if we had one of their fireworks.  One was missing and it was there before the three kids came down.  I just looked at her and said no we haven't seen their firework.  Seriously.  The woman was right there when Connor and Audrie walked away.  And when Nathan scootered by I didn't see anything extra on him either.
I think she just didn't want to share their fireworks and definitely is not neighborly.  Good to know.  But John is a really nice guy.

July 4th

I met a man this weekend who was in the Navy.  I figured he was because of his tattoo, but I had to ask to be sure.  You know what they say about assuming.  Anyway he had painted the flag pole and rocks around it at Sargent's Island.  The American flag hung proudly along with a POW/MIA flag.  I could tell there was something there close to his heart.
We had a brief conversation.  He served four tours in Vietnam.  I think that attests to the character of the man.  I told him "welcome home." He was so appreciative.
Vietnam was a war that was when I was a child and I can't say I know anything about it from my own life experience.  I was pretty sheltered. We lived in a very small town in the country.  As an adult I have a much better understanding of it.  Our society did not treat those veterans very nice when they returned home.  A lot of emotions that people didn't know what to do with and they thought it was all right to lash out at those most affected and they were wrong.
Here is what I know about Vietnam vets.  They don't talk about it.  It is a rare occurrence to hear any kind of story from a vet.  And that is all right.  People have the right to tell or not tell their story.  I read that to tell them "Welcome Home" is one of the best things we can do and I thought it is such a small thing.  I put it in my head that I would do that because the Vietnam vets I have met in my life have been outstanding men. This weekend was the first time I put it into practice.
And so Happy Fourth of July to all of us and Welcome home to the vets who fought in a horrible war, especially the man on the island, my little Donald and Dave H.  Hopefully for all of those suffering from PTSD you find some peace among this day of great noise.

Last Day

Our last day at the island was spent on the beach.  I packed us up and then went and sat with Pat and his friend Amy and her mom.  We watched the fishing poles.  We watched the little man fly a kite.  They found more dragonflies.  The little miss found great shells.  We were not in any hurry to leave the slow pace of the island.

Saturday

It was a day filled with nature. Pat fished most of the day.  Mom came out for dinner.  We saw lots of newly "hatched" dragonflies.  There was an eagle perched in the tree right about our heads.  I wish I could have gotten his head, but check out those claws.  The littles had several hours of river play.  It was a great day camping.