Valentine's Day

Let me tell you about my window.  Usually the little man is the one who has epic meltdowns that may culminate in broken things.  But this one started with the little woman.  I'm not sure what is up other than she seems to think his way gets a lot of attention.  So about a month ago she threw something at the front window and the outside pane broke.  Lovely.  I've spent a couple of different days picking up glass and wondering how to get the rest out of the frame. 
Move to today.  It was a little thing and I can't even remember what, but they were both melting down a bit.  Nothing major.  But he wanted her to stop and she wanted something else.  So she threw a metal yard decoration at that broken window.  Scared us.  I went out to talk to her about it and to settle down a bit.  I dont' need the whole thing escalating.  When all of a sudden the window went bang.  Yup.  Both panes are now broken.  Oy. 
I left the glass intact and pulled the shade down.  Otherwise all our heat is just going to fly out that window.  Now to figure out how to get it fixed.  And will it happen again?  Normally I don't replace things that get broken.  That way whatever it is doesn't get broken again.  Happy Valentine's Day to me.
So the day started as it usually does.  I get my coffee and I go online to check email and see what is happening on facebook.  Cassie is gushing about eating chocolate covered strawberries and how her children got giant plushies.  Well two of her children got giant plushies and two got nothing.  What amazes me is when she goes on facebook and complains about her relationship with these two and how unfair it is.....and yet she does not go out of her way to foster a relationship.  I'm pretty sure there are cards at a dollar store and stamps don't cost much and yet it is too much effort.  My heart does another little break every time the littles are forgotten. 
I bought a couple little gifts for the littles.  He got a new hoody and some chocolate.  She got a new heart dress, some chokers and candy.  I stopped at the dollar store and got really cute Valentine's Day bags for them and they were happy.  They had great days at school.  Then Mike called to wish them a Happy Valentine's Day.  They had a good Valentine's Day regardless of how mine went. 

House Rules

We came up with four.  No throwing things. No breaking things.  Be respectful.  And then the little man added being nice about telling someone no.  It falls under the be respectful umbrella.  As soon as I am put on the spot my brain freezes. But I thought my three umbrella rules were good.  Our new assignment was to come up with two more house rules that are tiny and specific.  This is the work we did with the home specialist.
And that is all fine and dandy.  I hate being asked what do you do for punishments.  It is hard to take things away and have it mean anything.  These kids do not care enough about anything for it to matter. The therapist thinks our house rules should include what the consequences/punishments are for breaking the house rules and that they should be handed out pretty darn quickly.  No waiting for a real calm down.  In my head I am not picturing it.  From past experience......he calms down, but its not real....if I say something about what has occurred he immediately amps right back up.
And then it felt pretty condescending tonight.  I was told not to let anyone watch R movies.  Ha.  If only they knew.  I was schooled on hygiene.  Not mine.  The little woman's anxiety does not let her in the bathroom long enough to take a bath.  She does not have an escape route and that bothers her.  So we do the best we can.  I can't take her outside and spray her down with the garden hose for Pete's sake.
There are many things I do not know about raising kids with brains changed from drugs in utero, but there are things I do know about raising kids in general.  I am a long ways from perfect and can use all the help I can get.  This is part of my support system and yet sometimes it doesn't feel supportive.

Annoyed

I hate the phone, I really do.  But I had to call the home specialist back because he left two messages.  Seems he wants to make one of our appointments next week earlier.  I understand that the therapist, who scheduled the appointments for next week, may not have a clue as to what else is going on in his schedule.  But we did the best we could with what showed available.
I didn't return his first call because we see him this week and I figured we could just redo it then. But obviously not.  Now it's not like I actually get to talk to him....just leave voicemail.  So I called and just cancelled it.  No we can't do it earlier when my kids aren't even home from school yet when he wanted it to be.  The little man already misses enough school, so no we can't do earlier.

The Lull is Over

Scheduled to work four days this week.  I had to shift one shift a bit so the little man can make his testing appt. with Dr. Holly. 
Working on returns.  Three full shelves of books this time.  I made a dent today, but just a dent.  I'm never a good judge on numbers.  But it feels like a pretty good return this quarter. 
Got to see Brenda today.  During our lulls we don't see each other much.  We work opposite days.  We weren't working on the same projects today though so we didn't have a lot of time to converse.  I really miss that gal when I don't see her much. 

Black Bean Chili

It has been sounding so good.  Maybe because the weather is cold.  So I asked Pat if he wanted some and he said not on Saturday.  That was fight night.  So today we went to his house and made chili and homemade corn bread.  He asked me to leave the leftover corn bread because he loves it.  We talked about how easy homemade is and how many years I used the boxes first.  The chili was divine. 
The little man got his game on and played and played.  The little woman played on the phone.  That seems to be her big thing right now. 
Pat told the little man he could spend a night next weekend.  It is a four day weekend for us grown-ups and a three day weekend for kids.  ;p

Cookies

The snow melted and we went and collected the girl scout cookies we had ordered.  The little woman has a lofty goal, but we started out small.  Although we did get more than last year.  We came home with 75 boxes of cookies.  Then we set about making that number smaller.  We walked around the block.  We ran out of one flavor and have ordered more.  I believe we have sold half of the boxes. 
And we will sell quite a few tomorrow when we meet up with a few people who let us know they wanted cookies. 
I was so impressed with the little woman.  She got a lot more no's than yes's.  And not a one of them seemed to bother her.  She just kept right on going up to doors and knocking.  Perseverance is the name of the game and she really has it.  I remember last year being impressed with her cookie both sales.  Now I'm impressed with her door to door sales. 

Here is the link to her cookie page.

Homework Assignment

Well this should be interesting.  I have a homework assignment from the therapist. She wants us to make a list of house rules and consequences for breaking them.  Oy.  We shall sit down and try.
Then we don't see her for two weeks.  She was already booked next week and the week after she is on vacation.  So she scheduled us for an extra visit with the home specialist.