Halloween

Audrie had her first Halloween.  Connor had his first Halloween.  Funny how that works.  Younger siblings get things much younger than the older ones.  Connor was a lion and Audrie was a tutu witch.  We went over to Grammy's house and "trick or treated" from her house to Jo Jo's house.  They made quite a haul even though they didn't really hit that many houses.  Audrie got scared by one man who was wearing a mask.  She turned with her bottom lip out and ran away from him.  She was okay after we explained it was a mask and he took it off.  Mike caught up to us about half way through so he got to experience it with his kids.  Once the kids are in bed I think at least half of their haul needs to disappear.  No one needs that much candy.  :p

SAC Court

Mike called today.  He did get into SAC court.  I am trying to be positive.  This isn't something that he has to do and at this point in his criminal career it doesn't gain him anything.  So maybe it means that he really does want to try the recovery road.  SAC court will be a lot like drug court in that he will get treatment and have random UAs.  Time will tell and the ball is in his court as it always has been.  He said he will be working on getting into an oxford house and that would be good.  He has goals.  Now we wait and see if his actions reflect that.

Three

Audrie turned three years-old today.  Feels like yesterday and an eternity.  She is such a loving, happy, smart, funny girl.  She has her moments of temper tantrums as she learns to deal with all those emotions that toddlers have.  She loves her brother even when she is being mean to him.  She is growing and changing.  I love how her face lights up when she realizes I have come home.  I hope she never loses that sense of love and contentment being with Nana and Papa.
Today we baked her brown cake and made her green frosting.  Her original plan was no writing, no candles, no ice cream and no presents.  For some reason she did not mind when Nana put the candle on the cake and she really did not mind the ice cream.  And presents are a no brainer.  She got play doh, a puzzle, a game and her curvy board.
Open Ended Creations created a great product.  Once she got that every thing else was forgotten for the time being.  She did not want to share even with Zach.  She took right to it and started playing.  Once Connor got it he was enthralled and you could see he thinks his sister gets the coolest stuff.  I think I made a good choice in this purchase.
It was a lovely party.  Thanks Mom, Jodi and Zach for helping make a memorable day for Audrie on this day she turned three.

Quiet Sunday

Mike called and talked to Audrie for her birthday.  Told us that a friend of ours was in jail with him.  Can't wait to hear that story.
Cassie called to make arrangements to see Audrie tomorrow.  We are going to try and make it after nap but before dinner.
Audrie and I talked about her cake all day.  Brown cake with green frosting.  No candle.  No writing.  No ice cream.  No presents.  I'm pretty sure there will be a candle and there will be ice cream and there will be presents.
Audrie and I managed to escape a little bit to hit the grocery store.  Bought the essentials.  We had forgotten to take the stroller out of the back so that left a limited amount of space in the car for groceries.  At least now we have bread.  :)

Family Dinner

Tonight we had  our family dinner at Red Lobster.  Connor got to try some new foods.  He was not too sure about his sissy feeding him lemon.  Audrie was pretty well behaved.  We all enjoyed our shrimp.  We had a nice time.  Thanks Mom and Pat for always being there.

I-pad Mini

Apple sent me an email inviting me to pre-order a Mini I-pad.  I looked at it.  Thought about it.  Thought about it some more.  It is quite a bit cheaper than the normal sized one, but not that much smaller in size.  Then we got thinking about how Audrie doesn't like to share.  And she already gets so upset when Connor gets near her and the I-pad.  So we decided that perhaps having two would be the prudent course of action. Audrie was 18 months when I got the first one and was immediately literate in using it.  I think Connor will be the same way.  He watches her and tries to make it work.  So today I pre-ordered one.  Maybe I just think it is so darn cute.  Either way, we will now own two mac products.  Who ever would have thought.

"The Graveyard Book"

I finally got around to starting Elizabeth's book.  I bought it for her two years ago about the time she informed me she really didn't like reading anymore.  Now I know that is not true, but for right then I wasn't arguing.  And I know it is a cool book.  The book got borrowed for awhile and then made its way back home.
The book is written for about ten year-olds or so.  And I love it.  It is about a boy who is raised in a graveyard by the inhabitants of the graveyard.  I love how Neil Gaiman's mind works.  I discovered him when someone gave me "Anansi Boys".  I had looked at that book and decided it really wasn't my genre of books.  Ha.  Boy was I wrong.  That lead me to "American Gods" which I loved.  I gave it to a friend of mine and she did not enjoy it as much as me, but we are from different generations.  His books are a little dark.  And I like them.  Think I will keep "The Graveyard Book" and put it in the kids's books.  Someday they may enjoy reading it or having it read to them.

Bits and Pieces

Audrie had her last speech therapy session this week.  She has now graduated out of the program.  She talks a lot more now.  Now we try and get her on the list for headstart for next year.  She qualifies, but won't be 4 years-old when the school year starts.  So she will probably be on a waiting list to see if there are any openings.
There was a permanency review hearing this week for Connor.  The decision at this point is if Mike and Cassie don't follow through with the service plan that a third party custody agreement will be in place for us. April will be the date to see what happens for Mike and Cassie.  So we just continue waiting and seeing, but at least now we have a plan in place that is court sanctioned.
Dave fixed the truck today.  Pat came out to help him.  Surprised me when he knocked.  I didn't know he was coming.  Tried to get him to stay for dinner, but he had things to do. So we made plans to go to Red Lobster for family dinner soon.  We have two birthdays coming up next week so family dinner is in order.  We enjoyed the meatloaf that he missed tonight though.
I'm getting used to having so many days off.  It is going to be hard to go back to four day weeks in a couple of weeks.  :p
And Connor is walking more and more all the time.

Serenity Prayer

Mike is still in jail.  Dave is sleeping or in pain or grumpy.  The little kids and I are just taking it all one day at a time.  We walk on egg shells.  And naturally the little kids don't understand so they push buttons.  I try to remind myself that it is a lot of stress and that alcoholics never learned how to deal with their emotions and so it manifests in rage and crankiness.
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
the courage to change the things I can
and the wisdom to know the difference.

Girl Day

Audrie and I had an adventure today.  We drove to town in time to sit and wait for the city bus.  Audrie has been saying all summer long how she wants to ride a bus.  So today was the day.  She flirted with people all the way there and all the way back.
At the mall we checked in for her 3 year-old pictures. While waiting Cassie showed up.  I had invited her after I made the appointment.  Left the ball in her court if she made it.  I was pleasantly surprised when she did.  She did her darnedest to get Audrie to smile and pose for pictures.  Audrie wasn't having anything to do  with the posing, but she did do some smiling.  The photographer was good enough to catch some of the smiles.  We picked a nice pose and moved on to the food court for lunch.  They have some coin operated cars there and Audrie managed to get herself invited to ride along when some other parents put money in.  Too funny.  Yesterday she wouldn't play with any kids at Little Cups and Grown-ups, but today she tried to play with the other kids.
We missed our bus home and had to wait for the next one.  Cassie waited with us.  No biggie for her since her bus runs every 15 minutes.
We had a good time and got a nice picture.  Our little girl is going to be three in just a few days.  Time has sure flown.

Little Cups and Grown-ups

A little kid friendly coffee shop opened in BG this month. It is called Little Cups and Grown-ups. I waited patiently to see what it would be.  Today I had the day off so we decided to check it out.  It is $4 per child to play, but crawlers are free.  So Connor doesn't cost anything for a few more days yet.  There was a playhouse, a slide structure, tons of toys, a kitchen, a stage for plays, a train station, among other things.  Well worth the $4 on a rainy morning.  Audrie never really played with any other kids.  She just did her own thing and still pushed kids out of her way without waiting her turn.  I still think she had a good time because she did not want to leave.  Connor just jumped right in the frey and played with everything.  He watched all those other kids and did some discovering all on his own.  The slide structure had a tunnel at ground level and he thought that was cool.  We found some soft balls and rolled those back and forth to each other.  Another little girl got in on that action until her mom made her go do something else.  Don't ask me.  Maybe just a paranoid mama since I'm a stranger.  Both little kids enjoyed it so we will go back.

Short Week

Looks like a couple more really short weeks at work.  This is reminiscent of when Sarah was our boss.  Since she was willing to work there was no reason to have one of us always there.  So I have five days to play this week.  And I like having all that time with the little kids.  I do feel the paycheck though.  But it's all good.

Roasted Pumpkin Seeds

Yum.  So this year I decided to try something different.  I took part of the cleaned, dried seeds and tossed them with 1/2 tsp curry, 1/2 tsp garlic powder, 1/2 tsp onion powder.  Drizzled with olive oil and sprinkled some salt and pepper.  Put them in a 400 degree oven for 15 minutes.  Now I wish I would have done the whole batch that way.  It was so good.
This year I got them cooked all the way and they all taste good.  Won't last long.

Pumpkin Carving

Or at least pumpkin cleaning.  The paper was laid and the carving set got.  Papa took off the tops so we were ready to rock.  And the seed gathering began.  At least I did not have to pick up every seed back off the floor after it was scraped out and put in the bowl.  Connor liked grabbing them out of the bowl and giving them a little fling.  He tried to eat the shell and a seed.  Neither one went over real well.  Silly boy...you have to wait for them to be cooked.  Audrie did a great job of cleaning out her pumpkin, but it was her second year at it.  :p
Papa carved faces into the little pumpkins and Nana tried and failed at carving a picture on the other one.  Ah well it was the fun that mattered.

Blessed

I am blessed to be moving forward.
I am blessed to be loved by my grandchildren.
I am blessed to be loved by my sons.
I am blessed with the practice of patience.
I am blessed with great family members who understand.
I am blessed with a sometimes sense of recovery.
I am blessed with beautiful surroundings.
I am blessed with wonderful siblings.
I am blessed with great friends.
I am blessed with health, happiness and faith.
I am blessed.

Transformation

Audrie finally has quite a bit of hair and it had grown pretty long.  She wouldn't let us put in pigtails or ponytails.  So it would look pretty bedraggled.  Today seemed like a good day to hit the hair salon and get a cut.  She was so well behaved and sat there mostly still.  She is just so beautiful and now you can see that instead of the crazy hair.  Maybe we will try growing it out again when she is 3 years-old.  :p

Pumpkin Patch

Since our pumpkin plant did not produce any usable pumpkins, Audrie and I went to the pumpkin patch to collect some.  We went to Scented Acres because our first trip to a patch does not need all the hoohaws or the expense to ride a hay wagon. We needed pumpkins.  Scented Acres was just perfect.  We got to pet and feed treats to the goats and chickens.  Audrie loved that the best.  Then we wheel-barrowed out to the patch and found our perfect pumpkins.  Came back by the goats and had a hard time getting Audrie to leave.  She really liked those goats.  They were named Wiggles and Nibbles.  Too cute.  We were only charged $3 for three pumpkins.  Can't beat that anywhere except in our own garden most of the time.
This weekend should be carving and roasting.  :)

Pediatric Development

Today Connor had his check up with Pediatric Development.  They follow drug babies.  So today he was checked on his gross motor skills, some cognitive skills and language.  He did well.  We knew that of course.  He is meeting his marks in terms of development.  He is working on walking and climbing.  He is a great problem solver and he showed that at the appointment today.  He chattered away and showed that he is working on language.
He will go back in about a year.  That is when the pre-school skills start emerging and that is a critical time in terms of development.  That appointment he will see a development pediatrician.  Today he just saw a nurse.
It is good to have the check ups done and know that he is doing well.  The nurse's biggest suggestions were to be consistent in parenting and to not give too many toys.  Fewer is better in that it teaches attention skills.  Interesting.  I told her he doesn't have any toys.  She looked at me funny.  Audrie claims all toys as hers.  :P

Good Vibes

We had cram it jam it at work today.  There were vendors on hand giving out samples.  There was entertainment.  And the end result is a person winning a backpack and 60 seconds to fill it.  Kind of a fun day.
I am the Baird girl now I think.  Which means I get to make the daily delivery to Baird.  While walking down I heard people talking about the Monster beverages they had received and the candy samples.  On the way back people were talking about the Odwalla samples.  So to me it meant the shin ding was a success in that it had people talking about the products for sale in our store.

A Quiet Day

Work was quiet.  We got two pallets of paper and binders.  Nice to have something to work on.  Appears there could be some drama in the works there, but for today it was quiet.
Audrie had her next to the last speech therapy session.  Susan came out this time to give us the latest results that show Audrie is caught up with her age group for speech.  They strongly recommend headstart for her next year.
It was bath night and the little kids smelled so good.  They always do after baths.  I just love cuddling when they are all sweet and clean.
It was just a quiet day and I like it.

First Day

At least for me.  I stayed in my little corner and did my job.  Watched as the big boss and the textbook buyer made sense of all the chaos that was bossman's desk.  Looked like they got a big handle on it after working on it all morning plus a couple of hours last Thursday.  It had to be somewhat frustrating for them, but you would never know if you weren't looking for the clues of that.
I could tell I had been gone for a few days.  I had some books to put out and dang if I could not remember where they should go.  Had to keep asking.  That always makes me feel stupid.  Glad we are in our lull while we make our transition.

Travelling

Alex at work asked me where I wanted to travel to next internationally.  I basically told her that wasn't in the plans.  She commented that she thought I liked to travel.  And I do. I had to explain how in the next fifteen years my house was going to be the priority....new roof, paint, deck, addition, etc.
Got me thinking about all the places we have been in my adult lifetime.
Oahu twice
Kauai
Maui
San Francisco twice
Seattle twice
New Orleans
Salt Lake City
Orlando
MN at least 15 times for family visits
Illinois, twice for family, once for boot camp graduation
Georgia, twice for family
Monterrey, once for family
Great Britain
Mexico cruise
Bahama cruise
Reno three times
Las Vegas

I feel well travelled and most of those trips were with at least one child.  That said we do plan on another Hawaii trip with the little kids.  I would also like to visit the east coast some more and Canada.  All good places to make plans for.

It is Always Something

Wes called and told me the DNA test results.  Then Mike calls from jail to start the beg for money dance.  It can't just be a good day.  It is always something.
I am quite happy that the test results proved what I have felt since the day before Connor was born.  And as I said I would do if that happened...I am laughing my ass off.  The stupidity of some people is just unbelievable.  C'est la vie.

Introducing Connor Gene

We are no longer in limbo.  Wes called today.  He got the paperwork on the DNA testing.  Mike is the father of Connor.  So Connor isn't going anywhere.  He is going to stay right here with us and his sister Audrie.  There are still legal hoops to jump through.  We want to get the birth certificate completed and his last name changed.  The third party custody agreement can now be started.  It is just such a relief.
All through Cassie's pregnancy I did not think that Mike was the dad.  Then I had the visit from my dad and since then I have known.  But there was always room for error.  So I kept an open mind and did not mind the time spent getting Connor downtown to visit with Wes.  It was not a waste of my time or effort.  I am sorry that Wes got his heart broke. We, on the other hand, are doing the happy dance.
So let me introduce my grandson, Connor Gene.  He is my little man.

Today

I am looking forward to the little kids returning home.
I am enjoying the newness of the bathroom with the newly painted wall.
I am amazed that my desk is cleaned off.
I am content with the start of the rain.
I am breathing and practicing ahimsa with no problems today.
I am blessed with a full pantry, freezer and refrigerator.
I am looking out for my brother.
I am connecting with my sister today.
I am happy that Doug liked his book.
I am happy that Doug let me know he liked his book.
I am relieved to know Mike is alive.
I am going to farmer's market today and I love it.
I am planning on a good week with good food, family and friends.
I am going to feed my mother at least one day this week.  :)
I am loving Dave.
I am appreciating my friends who gave us more clothes for the little kids.  Treva with two big bags and Barb with two new outfits apiece.
I am blessed.

Bits and Pieces

The bathroom is put back together and looks good.  I really do like it.  Thanks to Nana Nita for taking the kids and then I could use the time to do this.
My car speedometer is off.  I used the GPS to go to Tacoma.  It showed my miles per hour off by about ten percent.  Very weird.  That means I have never ever been at risk for a ticket since I have been going slower than I thought I was.  :P
Work is changing.  The bossman quit yesterday.  No notice. Just quit.  Wow.  Now we shall see what transpires and what the next one is like.  In the meantime the bookstore manager is covering his position.
Mike is in jail again.  I am a bad mom in that it always makes me happy.  Well I don't like the choices he makes to get there, but while he is there I know he is safer than he is on the streets.  And he has a bed, three squares, a shower and a roof.  We hadn't heard from him for awhile so now we know where he is.
I managed to get my desk cleaned off AGAIN.  We know how long that will last.  :p
And the rain has begun.  I see the grass already starting to green up.  I like it.  I was ready for the rain even though I was totally enjoying all those beautiful fall days.

Painted

Finally.  After being on the to-do list for two years, the wall in the main bathroom is painted.  I like how it turned out.  Tomorrow I will put the rest of the room back together and get a finished picture.
I definitely took advantage of the little kids being at Nana Nita's.  I also got my desk almost cleaned off and the peninsula half way cleaned off. I also managed to get dshs taken care of.  Connor had lost his TANF and it took several calls and faxes to get it straightened out.  While taking care of that we were able to add Audrie back on to it. I also had a question on child support that I got answered via a phone call.  It was a very productive day and I also got a little nap.  :)

Quietness

The little kids are spending a couple days with Nana Nita.  My house is so quiet.  Almost too quiet.  I actually slept all night with only one waking.  Whoa.  That never happens.  Took my time on the computer this morning and had no distractions.  That never happens.  :P
Now to see how much productiveness I can get done while they are gone.  Wish me luck.  I tend to get distracted by the computer.  :P

Tacoma

It was time for a trip up the I-5 corridor.  We hadn't been up since the beginning of August.  It just so happened that my friend Nathan asked when I was going to come visit them in Tacoma.  So we went around and around making sure schedules worked and we incorporated a visit with them in with a visit in Buckley.
Tuesday night after visitation with Wes  and speech therapy, the little kids and I headed up to Tacoma.  We spent the night with Nathan, Stacy and Collin.  This morning we walked down to a park by their house and played.  It was foggy and it was wet.  And the kids loved it.  This playground had a lot of things that twirled around.  Audrie does not suffer from motion sickness.  Then we went back to their place and had another cup of coffee and the kids played a little more.  They were pretty tired for the drive to Buckley.  Nana had a quiet drive because they both fell asleep pretty shortly into it.  It was a lovely visit with good friends.  They looked so well and it was cool seeing their 100+ year old house.  We will have to go again.

Destroying Books

I spent almost an hour this morning destroying books.  When books come in damaged, sometimes the vendor does not want the book back and we are to destroy them.  The first time is very very hard.  Destroy books. It is so wrong.  After that it is a piece of cake.  So today that was part of my job.  Bossman wanted the box cleared last week, but no one seemed to have time.  I made a dent.  It is usually one of those fill in jobs and I needed one of those this morning.
I like the lull times.

Being Mom

We have not heard from Mike in almost two weeks.  It is the absolute longest we have ever went without hearing from him.  Makes me kind of nervous.  I am not sure if it means he is out there doing his thing and has finally figured out we aren't helping him to that.  Or if he is in a ditch somewhere.  Or is he is cleaning up somewhere.  Guess time will tell, but it is hard on a mom not knowing.
I did see that Cassie is still alive.  That was good because she also hadn't been in any kind of contact since she got out of jail.  I will take my clues where I can find them.  I'm really not looking forward to someday having to explain things to the little kids.

Again

It seems like every weekend I have this great to do list.  And every weekend most of it doesn't get done.  Figures.  Anyway it was a nice quiet weekend.  The little man took three steps today.  He has taken some single steps, but not for a few days.  Then today he did three.  I see fun in the future.
I noticed today that Cassie is still in the world.  I like it when I can say that.  I watch for clues and am happy when I find them.

Zoo Again

First notice the shirt in the first picture.  It was meant to be one of her birthday presents at the end of the month when she turns 3 years-old.  She found it and is now wearing it.
The little kids and I ventured over to the zoo today.  It was just such a great day to go.  Papa stayed home and did some yard work that he has been wanting to do.  Going to the zoo with just Nana is quite a different experience.  We were there for three hours and Audrie got to play all she wanted to on all the statues.  She loved it.  The little man actually saw animals this time.  He saw the bats, the cheetahs, the penguins and the goats.  Audrie especially liked the hippos, giraffes and lions.
After we were done looking at the animals we had an elephant ear and sat on the grass.  Then Audrie ran in one direction and the little man pushed his stroller over to other people.  I was like really?  Another child of ours who just makes himself home with other folk.  Wow.  Guess so.
It was a great outing.  I love the zoo and I hope the little kids love it also.

Just Happy

I did it the old fashioned way.  It's not technical and it's not legal, but it gives me peace of mind.  I already knew.  My daddy told me and I'm pretty sure he can't lie to me.  My heart tells me.  The little man is ours.  And looking at the old fashioned way it looks like that is true.  Now we wait for the legal technical results which should say the same thing.  Mike and Cassie sure made some beautiful children.

And the curvy board is on its way.  What a great day.

Today

I am enjoying the lull at work and only have three day work weeks.
I am basking in the lovely fall days.  Sunny during the day and chilly at night.
I am amazed at the change in Audrie when we go places.  She is behaving better and more grown up.  Maybe she is ready to turn 3.
I am patiently waiting on the test results.
I am looking forward to seeing my friends up north.
I am feeling blessed that the pantry is full and the woodshed is full.
I am feeling blessed in the love of the little kids and Dave.
I am breathing and practicing ahimsa.
I am thankful every day that I get to practice patience.
I am moving back to frugal living.
I am laughing at Kristie's little jokes.  I get her sense of humor.
I am looking forward to the next kid outing.  Sometime this weekend I think.
I am blessed.

Wayward

So the wayward parents are alive.  Mike called one day last week to see if he could get a ride from the hospital. We had heard that he was in again for an overdose.  Then Cassie changed her relationship status on facebook so we know she too is at least still alive.  It is funny how we take our little clues from where we can find them to see if they are still with us.
We still sit and wait for the call that says things have changed.  One way or the other.  Unfortunately I am beginning to think we are expecting the call that says they overdosed and died or were shot and died.  Sad really.

Curvy Board

I've been looking at this curvy board for the last month thinking it would make a cool gift for Audrie.  I just wasn't too sure about the price, even though I know how much work went into to.  Well today I did it.  Got it ordered so it will get here in plenty of time for her birthday.  You can see one HERE. I'm sure the little man will get lots of use out of it also.  Double win for Nana.

Addendum; This small company, Open Ended Creations, has so impressed me already.  I discovered right after my purchase that readers of a certain blog could use a coupon.  I emailed and asked if I could still use that coupon even though I had already made my purchase.  They got right back to me and gave me a refund for the amount of the coupon.  I was of the mind that it wouldn't hurt to ask.  I had bought the product either way, but it pleased me to get some money back.  :) And I loved the great customer service with the prompt attention.

Fall Plans

The zoo.  It has been bumped too many times.
A 3rd birthday party.
A 1st birthday party.
Halloween.  I think Audrie gets to experience it this year.
Two trips north with one coming up.
An overnighter at Nathan and Stacy's.  Sweet.
Little kids get to spend a few days with Nana Nita.
A bathroom wall will be painted.  I promise.  I've only had the paint for two years.
The green wall will be finished.
Audrie will get some more pictures taken.  :)
Farmer's Market to use up the WIC checks.
Thanksgiving.