Another River Walk

Audrie wanted to go walk by the river again and see Mommy. So I texted Cassie to see if she was available.  She was. So we walked and walked. Connor even walked some of it and pushed the stroller. That is reminiscent of Audrie when she was younger. While we walked three miles of sidewalk, I'm sure Audrie and Cassie walked much more. We met lots of dogs and Audrie is finally starting to ask first. There were a lot of people walking, bike riding, strolling and rollerblading. It was a lovely afternoon.

Crowns

I'm in the process of getting two crowns for cracked teeth.  Well technically one tooth was cracked from old fillings and the other tooth has a cracked filling.  My initial assumption was I would need a root canal on the cracked filling tooth, not realizing it was a cracked filling.  So I knew my normal dentist doesn't do root canals and I can't afford a specialist.  So it was time to find a new dentist and that is a daunting task.  Dr. T has the best dentist hands ever and it meant going back to dentists who aren't gentle.
Dr; Lee had an ad about no insurance patients so I gave him a try.  My first appointment I had X-rays and an exam.  I got charged $48 for the X-rays and the exam was free.  He suggested the more expensive crown for both teeth and no root canals.  Each crown is $990.  Ouch, but okay.  So I figured about $1300 per crown by the time we add in all the extras like the crown prep.  Thinking that is still a pretty good price.  I scheduled the first appointment and it was for the oldest cracked tooth first because it was sensitive to cold and now warmth.  And the cracked filling had no symptoms.
On the next appointment I got the crown prep done.  Easy peasy.  I have found a dentist with hands damn near as gentle as Dr. T's.  Didn't even feel the shot.  Went up to the desk to schedule the real crown appt. and the charge is $990.  No other charges at all.  What????  Yup.  $990.  Other than not liking it at all....got to like that.
Next week I get the first crown and then we start the second crown.

Home Town

Mom decided she was hungry for a Denver Omelette.  So she took us out for lunch at the Hockinson Cafe.  While there we ran into the Eldreds.  I hadn't ran into Dave in years, but I run into his wife once in awhile.  Kai was with them and he is a young man now.  Funny how that happens.  Then I saw the Cossmans out and about having lunch.  Saw some other familiar faces and talked to a member of the motorcycle club my brother belongs to.  Kind of nice to have the home town feel and see people you know when you go out.

On another note.....Poor Connor.  He fell off the bench of the picnic table at the playground. Face first.  Scraped up his face some more than it already was.  And man did it bleed.  Carried him home and cleaned him up.  He was not a happy camper at all.  I think he hated the clean up worse than the fall and scrape.  Wonder what they are going to think tomorrow at daycare?

Mom's BBQ

No pot is safe from him.

 Dancing/

 The lilac that I gave Mom when she first moved in there in 2001

Checking out the ants nest.

We had a lovely BBQ at Mom's house. She bought pepper steaks and Pat bbqed them up. The little kids played in the backyard. Audrie sat in an ants nest and freaked out. Lucky it was tiny ants. She was okay with looking at the nest later. The food was delicious and the company great. Mom so liked having us over to her house for a change. You almost would have thought it was her idea instead of Pat's.

Passive Aggressive

I'm the queen of it. And yet Dave plays that game too. He let Audrie get by with no nap and then told me she might be cranky tonight. He knew we had dinner plans.  Lucky she only had a small meltdown when we first got to the restaurant and then she was fine.

Our Evening

The littles and I had dinner with Jacob at Thai Lotus.  Haven't been there in ages.  Sam asked all the right questions and wanted to know if I had seen David lately.  Jacob is looking for a new job.  Said this last week with only his bookstore job was driving him crazy.  He just spent four months working full time for an accountant through tax season.  Figured he was getting about 60 hours a week between the two jobs and now he is down to 20 with just the bookstore.  We talked about going dancing next weekend.
After dinner the littles and I hit Great Clips and got them haircuts.  Connor looks so trendy now and Audrie is all cleaned up again.  They should both feel better for awhile and definitely look better.  Haircuts were on sale so that made Nana happy.

Life

Mike is back in jail. I let Dave know to keep him apprised.
Today I'm going to let Dave have the kids for a few hours under the condition he doesn't drink or get high on his pain pills. I almost changed my mind when he gave me the same old song and dance about how sober he is and he only uses the pills occasionally.
I think Cassie is back using also. But I will still give her opportunities to be with the kids. Guess those will be early in the day also, just like Dave.

Shadow

Today Connor discovered he had a shadow. And he did not like it. It scared him when he couldn't get away from it. He did the funniest dance in the parking lot trying. I had to bite my lip to not just crack up at him. He was so serious about it. And then he turned it off and finished heading to the playground. He is too funny.

A Birthday Run North

Today is my mom's 70th birthday.  I gave her the option of going out for dinner or going north with us to visit the folks up there.  She chose to go north with us.  So that is how we spent her day.  We got up early and headed up to Nathan and Stacy's place.  We made them a pizza for lunch.  The littles had a great time playing with Collin's toys.  Then we headed over to Nana Nita's and visited with her for awhile.  It was nice being able to speak freely there.  Then it was time to go see Emmi.  Connor is now Emmi's boy and Audrie is fascinated with the little dog.  Funny how they change.
We left a little early because we needed to get home before it was dark.  Made it with a few minutes to spare.
And I have a new GPS now.  Seems Mom bought one and misplaced it.  She was sure it had been stolen and she bought another one.  Today both of them turned up.  Way too late to return one, so she gave me one of them.  Got to like that.  And it explains how she couldn't find my address in one the other day...it wasn't the one I programmed my address into.  :p

River Walk

The little kids and I ventured downtown Vancouver to take a river walk.  There is the nicest park with a great sidewalk for walking, bike riding, etc.  We saw ducks and geese.  Petted quite a few dogs and Audrie was very very gentle.  Connor gained a pine cone until Nana forgot it.  Audrie walked the entire way and it was a two mile walk today.  Yay for her.  On our way back Cassie joined us.  She took the kids down by the river and they threw rocks in.  The little kids loved that and didn't want to quit.  We stopped at Who Song and Larrys' and had lunch.  The kids were so well behaved.  Connor likes salsa.  It was a great outing and I'm glad Cassie was able to join us and spend time with the kids.

Story of the End Table

So I have been watching craigslist for an end table.  At this point in time I don't need a coffee table.  So I finally find one I liked for a price I was willing to spend.  Called the people a couple of times and got no answer.  Okay.  I shoot them an email because I am interested and figured maybe they work during the day like normal people.  That evening I get a response back that they don't answer their phone.  They expect people to leave a message and they will return the call when they get around to it.  Say what?  You placed an ad on craigslist and gave your number when you don't plan on answering your phone.  Really?  Seriously?
The next line of the email tells me to leave a message or I can email her my number and she will call me.  I almost didn't do it just for spite, but I liked the table and the price.   So I emailed her.  Ha...she had to leave me a message because I was at work the next day when she called.  So we played phone tag and then finally connected.  I bought the table and hauled it home.  Still in awe about placing an ad with a number that won't be answered.

Plans

We had plans to go do the river walk after naps.  Naps ended up being late and when we got up it was wet. The great Pacific Northwest.  So we switched gears and skipped it.  So it is added to our list for the week.  Maybe Tuesday.
This week will be busy even though I only work two days.  We have dinner with Dave because he seems to think he needs to feed us in order to see the kids and then he spends his time cooking instead of seeing the kids.  We have a trip north.  A river walk. Grocery shopping.  Two side jobs.  Lunch with the ladies.  Housecleaning, housecleaning, housecleaning.  And so it goes.

Okay. Seriously.

Dave made comment about my ignoring his texts about Mike.  I basically told him what I felt and of course he said he only wants to keep me apprised of what is going on with Mike. Yeah right.  Anyway my relationship with Mike is my relationship.  I will worry as I choose to, not because Dave now has a confidant in one of Mike's friends.  Supposedly this friend was soliciting Dave's help in helping Mike.  You can't get help from another addict not in recovery.  And I still say pot kettle black when Dave is talking about Mike.
From there the conversation went on about how he took a telemarketer call and actually had the people come out and give him a bid on an awning because afterall we have been talking about it for years.  Well he has been talking about it for years.  I just sit there and listen.  Anyway he liked what he heard and he is probably going to do it.  Money seems to be flowing through his fingers.  This after he bought the battery operated car for Audrie.  I'm not going to work it out for him.  In the past I have always been the one who made all of his desires come true.  What I was thinking....was wait till the divorce and take an extra 5k out of the IRA because that amount isn't going to matter compared to what will come to me.  But he seems not to have a clue that that is coming down the pike. Ah well, c'est la vie.  But I am thinking it is time to quit procrastinating since he is in spend mode.

Kid Day

Today was a day for the kids.  We went to the park and spent a couple hours there.  Mommy came and joined us at the end and played with the kids on the playground. We saw a great flock of geese across the street from the park.  Then after naps they got to play at our playground with the neighbor kids.  We hit the McDonald's drive-thru and then after that we went for a night time walk.  It was very nice and a good day.

Lunch

Looks like we are back to Friday lunches. At least for awhile. I left the little kids with Jodi. Mona and I had a lovely lunch, just the two of us. Caught up on her trip to Ariona and all the goings on in my life. I gave her a ride home as she didn't feel comfortable driving after her tiring trip. So good to see her. I miss her when she is on her extended stays in Arizona.

Better Day

We are on the mend. I actually slept last night.  Today we managed to get a few things done. Recerts at WIC. Took two bags to the goodwill. Played briefly on the playground. My girl needed to eat and was having a meltdown. Walked around Fred Meyers and found nothing to buy. Got some flowers for our garden and planted them. I think they will have a hard life with my little man. He already popped off the flower heads. Looked at bbqs and found one I like in my price range.

Boundaries and Co-dependent

I'm trying.  I'm trying.  I'm trying.  I'm trying to treat my adult child as an adult and let him suffer his consequences of his actions.  I try not to think about what he is doing.  I try not to worry about it.  So Dave texts me daily giving me updates.  I don't want that.  It feels like an anchor pulling me back down into the land of co-dependence.  And I am sure that is exactly what Dave intends.  Because if I am in the land of co-dependence he can manipulate me also.  Arrgghhh.
Dave kicked him out tonight and then immediately texts me forewarning me that Mike may be coming to hit me up for money or a ride.  Then an hour later he texts me again asking if Mike ever showed up.  Let it go.
And now it is time for sleep.

Tired

I think my cold just zapped me.  I am so tired.  Probably from not sleeping so well through these coughing jags. Glad I made the decision today to stay home instead of travelling north.  And I'm sure all those people up there are glad we didn't come expose them to whatever we got.
Audrie says her ears do not hurt anymore.  Connor seems better than me.  He coughs a lot less.  Another day of rest should do us some good.

Ears and Colds

Audrie's first antibiotic didn't have enough kick to get rid of her ear infection. So we had to go back to the doctor and get a new one. So now we wait and see again. And in the meantime our cold, that we have already had for a week, geared up a notch. We are coughing. Deeply. Connor sleeps better than me. Audrie still isn't coughing too much. Funny how we get different symptoms from the same illness.

In Spirit

Today my spirit was in Minnesota with all my relatives. They laid Doris Polinder to rest. It was a long journey my family was on. And now they start the next leg of it....figuring out what life is like without Doris. She is such a big part of my Minnesota experience.  I'm going to have another "this feels weird" feeling when I go back. It was like that my first trip after my grandparents were gone.
My last trip included a pizza party and I got to visit with Fred and Doris. I'm really glad they could make it. The trip before we had a really good chat at Tammy's graduation party. Seems like we always had these nice chats and Doris was a good listener. I'm going to miss her.

Not as Expected

Dave cooked his lovely meal last night. I just wasn't hungry. He wanted to show off the cedar chest he is refinishing for Audrie. I was looking at a video on the Internet so didn't hop right to it. He bought Audrie a brand new battery operated car, which she loved. But it started raining right as we got there. She needs to learn how to drive it. She has never had a forward and reverse before. The evening did not go as he planned it and envisioned it to go.
After my visit with the dentist...I'm mad. I need two crowns. That is a couple of grand out of my pocket. One of those teeth needed a crown for awhile and it was on the list of things to be done at Dr. T's. but then Dave quit his job and we had no insurance.  So I feel annoyed. At the time enough money was being spent on other medical bills that the dentist got put off. So now I'm annoyed with him for making choices that still impact me and I'm annoyed with the choices I made that put off that work when part of it would have been paid for. To top it off he had a filling done this week and was complaining that it cost $350. I don't want to hear it.

Over

Spring rush is over. I think it went well. I'm surprised at how tired I was early in the week. I think it was having to get up so early. We need enough time to get our morning routine done. I felt better late in the week, but completely crashed by the end of today.
We are still adjusting to all the changes. We are down to only three of us receivers and Liz. Liz gets right in there and helps us get stuff done. Nice to have our hours back up and to have a boss who works as hard as we do.

Pictures

They are growing up so fast.  Too fast.  Wow, fast.

And Again

So Dave invited us over for dinner via text. When I hadn't responded quick enough he called. I think he does not realize that he sounds different on the phone when he is high. And by high I mean pills, drugs or alcohol. Anyway we are going over on Friday as he won't see the kids till then after my long week at work.
And today he texts while I'm at work wanting to know if I need anything from Costco since he is there. I don't know what he was thinking.....I was at work not on my phone.

Randomness

Ricky gets told the most random stuff. He has decided to not have eye contact with people anymore when he is working bag checking.  Today some man giggled and told him he had a really deep voice. Yesterday a man gave him a whole big story filled with intolerances and total non truths. And yet that guy was convinced that schools were teaching his son to drink and that his ex wife was living this horrible life filled with transvestites and homosexuals. All Ricky had said was good luck out there and then he got this earful. Just random stuff, but it always keeps us amused.

Spring Rush 2013

First day of classes for spring. We were steady busy all day. I worked a full 8 hours. Tomorrow we bring out the mats for security. They make a tremendous difference on our feet. The funniest thing that happened today was a guide dog was licking Carrie's toes. I'm not sure she appreciated it, but I did. I spent a good amount of time today in the bag check room. Building muscles lifting some of those backpacks. Jacob even had to do that today. Good for all of us to mix it up and do all the jobs. It is definitely not Rich's game anymore. Day one done.

Zoo Dues

After much consideration I decided to again pay for a membership to the zoo.  This year I think the kids and I will utilize it even more than last year.  I'm thinking we may go to some of those concerts and the zoolights for sure.  I added Zach this year and I can take a guest so I can take Jodi if she EVER gets a day off.  Looking forward to it.  I love the zoo.

Some Things Don't Change

"You seem a little grumpy." I said I wasn't, but I really was. Dave came over to see the kids. The first thing he did was start complaining about Mike and Mike's friend. He was referring to her as a piece of tail. And it just freaking annoys me how derogatory Dave is about women. I honestly think he really dislikes women. I stopped him and told him her name...Felicia. His comment was he never got the courtesy of an introduction. I did. And I don't care if he did, I hate the names he calls people.  At least he quit complaining.

Ears and Eyes

Last night Audrie voluntarily slept in her own bed. She didn't want the light on while I read. It could have been a clue as she wanted the shades closed yesterday also. Today at nap she wanted Jammie's and then slept fitfully. Woke up complaining about her ear. After a small consideration I took her to urgent care. Dual ear infections. She now gets drops and a course of antibiotics.
After her medicine kicked in we ran to the mall and picked up my new glasses. Wow. I can see, it's a miracle. Will take a little getting used to and these frames are fun.
Tonight she is again in her own bed. Got to like that.

RIP Doris Polinder

And the struggle ended.  I don't have details but I know that Doris is no longer in any pain.  She has three beautiful daughters and four wonderful grandkids and one great grandchild.  They all stayed near her all their lives.  She leaves behind her husband Fred.
When Brenda texted me today my first thought was of the card Doris had sent me and that I received yesterday.  I will miss her.  I know her family has a rough road ahead but they will get through it.  The cycle of life is always hard and never seems fair.

Peace

Sending peaceful thoughts to our cousins tonight.  Brenda is struggling with the end of life of her mom.  Her mom is struggling with that whole process and I'm sure the rest are also.  Doris has been fighting this fight for quite awhile.  She has spent a lot of time in and out of hospitals and a care home the past several months.  And being so far away all I can do is send these thoughts and send them light and love.

I'm Not Hon

I do my darnedest to make sure I'm not touched.  Mostly I don't like it.  This doesn't apply to little kids or my child.  It used to not apply to Dave.  And then it did and for a very short period of time in 2012 it didn't. But now it does.  And so he had invited us over for dinner.  I accepted because the kids need to see him and he needs to see them.  I was blocking the doorway watching Connor when he wanted outside. Called me 'Hon' and put his hand on my shoulder.  And my skin crawled.  It took a lot of strength not to jerk away from him but to just move.  And I am not 'Hon' any longer.  It feels like he is still trying to lay claim and I don't like it.  Now he and the kids had a nice visit.  The kids were mostly behaved which helps.  But I think we need to put some time distance between these dinners also.  As we left he again called me hon and I don't like it.

Family Dinner

Betty and Norman came over tonight and brought us dinner.  They picked up a pizza at Rocky's and some salad and grapes from the store.  I contributed the company and the salad dressing.  We had a lovely meal and Audrie as usual turned her nose up at it.  Connor chowed on grapes and a couple bites of pizza.  We talked about raising two busy kids, grandma's purse and family history.  Normy called me a saint.  He was pretty sure he would never have had the patience for two busy kids.  I just take it one day at a time.
And I'm glad my little woman is back in the fold.  I enjoyed my time by myself, but I sure missed them.  And now we get to get back to routine.  And if Cassie is correct in her ability to do what she wants I am going to have to find a way to incorporate her into my life.

One Back

I had just gotten home when Cassie called and asked if they could drop off Connor and just keep Audrie the last night.  Well of course.  Gave each kid a little one on one time with someone.  Connor and I went for a walk, picked up Daddy and took him home, played at Papa's for a few minutes and then came home to bath and playground.  He loved doing the slide all by himself. Guess he figured it out well.  He sits at the top and then rolls over so he is on his tummy going feet first.  That shoots him off the slide but he lands on his feet.  Too cute.  When it was bedtime it was bedtime and he was out like a light.  Nana enjoyed her time with her little man.

Another Night

I heard from Cassie today.  She wanted to know if she and Nana Nita could keep the kids another night.  That means they are coming home Wednesday.  I said that was all right but they needed to come home Wednesday as Uncle Norman is coming for dinner.  I believe that Nana Nita is also going home to Milton on Wednesday.  So I will have another evening without the kids.  I miss them.  I did talk to Audrie on the phone and the first thing she told me is "I'm right here".  It is our thing.  Melted my heart.  She said she and Connor were having a good time.

Glasses

I finally broke down and paid to see an optometrist to get a new script for glasses.  My old glasses are just fading.  They were pretty amazed at them actually and had no idea what had caused them to do what they did.  Lucky me.  Two defective pairs of glasses in a row.  Anyway I will have my new glasses in ten days and I decided to act my age (43) and get transitions.  It has been getting annoying having to take my glasses off all the time to see close up.  The optometrist showed me what it would be like with transitions and I think I might like them.  I'm sure I will like the new script as it should help me see better.  Better.