Little Tigers

I love our daycare. First and foremost they hug my kids. I had been told that day cares didn't do that anymore because of liability issues. That is bunk. Babies need hugs. Well my daycare hugs.  Then I love all the things the littles learn and the things Nana learns. I try to use the same words in disciplining and I get better response. Connor pulls hair. So I told him to let Sissy go, that pulling hair was not okay. He just let go. I didn't have to pry his fingers from around her hair. Wow. I love the things we learn.

Lull

I guess we had our big push for summer quarter. I think I missed it. We are already going back to short weeks. Inventory this year falls before summer rush, so that may have a play in this. Just feels really strange.

Time

I don't know what he was thinking, but he decided to lock me out of the online banking. And that pissed me off.  And it moved me.  I FINALLY made the appointment with an attorney.  Then I took my debit card and the checks I found and gave them to him.  Told him about the appointment.
We had an actual conversation.  I told him what I wanted and he agreed.  He seemed relieved that I was not wanting the house and property.  Because as I was told it is family land.  Anyhow it is good that initially he is not up in arms.  I'm pretty sure what I want is what I will get.  If it were to all be added up, I'm not taking half.
In the midst of this conversation he commented that he thought we would stay married until I wanted to get remarried..Say What?  For tax purposes.  I had gotten that gist before and was shocked then.  Still amazed at the thought process.  No I'm not going to stay married while living somewhere else.  I want to be self sufficient with a small sense of security.  I need to be on my own for that.

And the Fighting Begins

Our big outing of the day was a trip to Toys R Us.  Boy there are a lot of cool things to play with there.  The littles had to sit in every battery operated car.  It was funny when Audrie popped the hood on one to check out the engine.  We came home with two Barbies (who have since lost their clothes) and a new scooter.  I have been watching for a used three wheeled one for over a month and have given up.  Found this one for $25 so got it.  Taking Pat's advice which is to save the box and then maybe ebay it when we are done depending on abuse between now and then.  They won't be on a three wheeled one long.

Summertime

Making plans for the summer season.
1. Beach trip. Time for the little man to discover sand in his diaper.
2. Six to sunset concerts, at least three. Dance little kids.
3. Sunset at the zoo concert. Because we can.
4. Trip north to play with the cousins.
5. Trip north to visit the Puget Sound with the VanWagoners.
6. Hike a local trail. One of us may stroll.
7. Dinner with David and Emma. Maybe three times as I love breaking bread with them.

Saturday Market

It was a toss up between the beach and the Portland Saturday Market. Audrie made the decision for us by not getting dressed until almost noon. ;p   We parked at the Cascade Station. On the way to the max line we passed 105.1 the buzz and they gave us Jamba Juice smoothies. We drank them while waiting for the max. Connor was enchanted with max. He got a different view of the freeway. Audrie was an old pro by now.
The market was packed. We met lots of dogs. We saw interesting art. We just missed Jacob, who must have had the same idea we did.  Then we returned home, with a stop at Wow Burgers for French fries. They both fell asleep in the car.

Big Boat

The Hawaiian Chieftain was docked by the Inn at the Quay, so we drove on down and checked it out. The Lady Washington was also suppose to be there, but I think she hadn't made it yet. Still we got a nice look with no crowds this morning.  Later they will be having tours, but I didn't think we needed to do that....not with a stroller.  Pretty spectacular boat from its time period.  Here is info about the boats. It was pretty chilly down by the river today.  Connor still enjoyed the planes and the boats.  We got back in the car just before it started to rain again.  We had good timing.

The Best Journey

Here I am, living with my grandchildren.  Loving all that it entails.  We have suffered a lot of losses to get here.  When Dave and I took on the job legally of raising Audrie, we supposedly had support from his daughter.  And then she went on to make sure she wasn't available. That to the point of complete estrangement and that is all right after it came to be.  Along came Connor and we took him on also. We had Nana Nita who then moved north after her divorce.  I totally understand the move and the reasons for it, but it was still a big loss for us in every day living.  And then my own marriage finished blowing up.  But I knew a year ago that I would be able to do this because I already had to.  And so here we are.
We are creating a home every day.  We are living life and experiencing it.  We have a lot of fun.  We have a lot of frustration such as comes with a three year-old and an 18 month old. You walk up to my house and you know there are kids here.  There are chalk drawings on the concrete.  When you walk in you see the toys hopefully in the bins, but most likely on the floor.  I am not cooking gourmet meals.  Simple fare for child tastes.  We pick up and go to the park whenever we feel like it.  And we go to a lot of parks.
I am making strong efforts to include their parents in our lives.  And yes I know that means coming and going.  And that is hard to deal with, but we do it.  I am still making the drive north as often as I can so they see Nana Nita and Uncle Isaac and Aunt Treva and the cousins.  I want these connections for them and do what I can to see that it happens.  Not always successfully, but I try.
I am on the best journey of my life and I am taking the two of them with me.  And just wait until they get a little bit bigger and we start making that journey a little bit bigger and farther.  I feel so content with them and our life.

Seriously

So Dave got a visa bill and he actually looked at it. It showed two charges for comcast a month apart. My guess is the billing cycle has moved just right for that to happen, but it should be fine because of the payments set up through bill payer. So he wants to know if one of those charges is mine for my house. WTF. Everything of mine, except the car insurance, is totally separate from his and has been since I moved. Seriously.

Poor Girl

Cassie is in jail.  My suspicion is something from awhile back caught up with her.  And so she will most likely be there for awhile.  She was picked up on a no bail warrant so she isn't getting out until she is done.
And that leaves us with loose ends.  We have been including her at least once a week in an activity.
I think Audrie understands that she may not see Mommy for awhile.  She knows when Daddy goes to jail she doesn't see him for awhile.  So it brought on a nice night terror.  Wow.  She has long ones.  Reading up on it and it is exactly what she has had a few times.  They can be brought on by over tiredness and separation anxiety.  Yup.  Poor girl.  At least now we know what is going on and are making a bigger effort for patience and more sleep.  I can always use more sleep.  :p
And perhaps when Cassie gets out of jail we will continue adding her to our activities.

Small Loss

Turns out that the neighbors by the park have given their notice to move. Audrie will lose Walker and Connor will lose Milo as playmates. They have other kids in the complex to play with, but these two were almost the same ages.  It is a little loss for them and I'm sure they will weather it fine.

Lazy Sunday

Connor woke up late. Just as I was checking on him he threw up all over his bed. Ah. That explained sleeping in for him. We spent the rest of the morning just relaxing and resting on the couch. He would fall asleep for awhile and then be awake just cuddling. Audrie was being very caring and kind. Finally she went out to play with Tristyn and he fell asleep on the floor.
It is the first time in so long that I didn't get dressed until the afternoon. Lazy day. And yet I got a bit of picking up done and some laundry done.  And Connor felt much better after his nap.

Red Balloon

We walked over to the local farmers market this morning. Audrie got a ring that she lost before we got home. She also got a red balloon. We had lunch at Pasta Gigi's. Reminder to self...never order a grilled cheese there. They put tomatoes and onions on it. Wrong, completely wrong. The kids played with the balloon the whole way home. It was a helium balloon, so Connor loved letting go so it could float up as far as the string would allow. They played with it some more after naps until it popped. The look on Connor's face was priceless. He did not understand what happened or where the balloon went. All play is learning and they got a lot out of that red balloon.

Pics

What a Man

I took the littles down to Esther Short park today to play with Cassie for awhile.  Cassie had held Audrie up to the bars you swing across moving from bar to bar.  Well Connor wanted to be held up also. She lifted him up and he grabbed a bar with one hand.  She let him go and he hung there on one arm.  Then she showed him how to hang with both arms and he did it. Wow. My little chunk is strong.  He weighs 30 pounds and that is a lot of weight on those little arms.  He is amazing.  And then naturally Audrie had to show that she could do it too and she can. She didn't do the one arm hang though.  :p

Betsy

After my conversation with Walker's mom the other day I thought about it.  I could see her face.  I could remember a short conversation about Christmas that I had with her.  So I found Mike's scrap book at Dave's house and found her.  She was in third grade with Mike.  I had thought second and she said no she had a different teacher for sure that year.  

I took the class picture over to show her and she was so surprised.  She comes from a large family and she was the baby.  That meant there are no class pictures for her.  She really enjoyed looking at it.  Maybe I should get it scanned and a copy made for her.  

Life is Good

Tuesday was another day of shipping.  The returns should be done today.  But I got the day off.  So the little kids and I went to Walmart and got a bike lock for the bbq and then we went to Costco for diapers while the coupon was good.  Was awful easy to spend $200 quickly.  Diapers, coffee, cheese, bananas, kitchen towels, juice and a movie for the kids.  Come to find out Costco takes EBT so I was able to use that instead of my shorter supply of cash.  I am happy to know this for future reference.  Life is good.

Shipping

Today I worked in returns all day. Checking the pulls, boxing them up and entering shipping info.  Whew.  Makes me very tired.  We figure we will be done with returns this week and that is a record.  To be fair the returns are light this quarter.  Next week we will start receiving next quarters books.  It will be good that all the returns are done and off the shelves.  

It is just kind of weird doing shipping.  It is out of my comfort zone and I feel so slow at it.  I did twelve returns today and they were mostly small.  Maybe I will do quicker work tomorrow as it becomes a little more comfortable.  

Bits and Bobs

Walker's mom came to collect him the other night.  I got talking to her and it turns out she went to school with Mike all the way through.  She remembers me coming to school.  Well I did volunteer up till Mike was in seventh grade.  Small world.  Her world is more sheltered than mine.  Wish I could have lived in her world.  She just found out about the heroin problem in our town.
I need a board for my bbq.  Hot dogs roll because my patio isn't level.  And I don't think moving the bbq will help.  I noticed my new neighbor has a board under  his smoker and it gave me the idea.
My heart broke for Jodi this morning.  Josh did not acknowledge today being Mother's Day even though he was getting dressed and leaving to go out to brunch with his girlfriend and her mom.  Jodi kind of thought the girlfriend should have made Josh get something.  I think she is leaving it up to him as it is his responsibility.  And I think that is smart of her really.  It did break Jodi's heart though.
Connor has figured out how to climb up onto the counters.  Yay for me. What a little man or should I say little monkey.

Future

Thinking about the future and how it may look.  I go back and forth on ever being in a house again.  There are nice things about it, but there are nice things about apartments.  Anything breaks and I'm not responsible for it.  I don't have a yard I have to maintain.  That means I don't have a garden either though.  Back and forth I go.  Either way eventually I will need a three bedroom place or a two bedroom place with a loft.  

And then I think about relationships.  I don't ever see myself opening up myself to anyone again the way I did in my marriage.  Probably why I don't ever plan on another one of those.  It's not that my marriage was all bad.  It is just the past ten years really overshadow the good things.  And that is sad.  And makes me want to keep myself to myself.  Safer that way.  

Flowers

This morning we didn't have anything specific planned. So we went to the Farmers' Market and bought Mother's Day flowers. We spent an hour in the fountain and an hour on the playground. Had a little lunch picnic in the shade. On the way out we ran into Josh and Rachel.

Finally managed to connect with Jodi to give her her flowers. Audrie picked really well and Jodi liked them. There were some really pretty tulips in the bouquet.

BBQ

I bought my little gas BBQ today. The littles got the tank and cover for me, with Papa's help, for Mother's Day. So tonight my friend David came over and we broke it in with hot dogs and brats. Tristan ate with us again and was a happy girl. When we weren't looking Connor helped himself to the bowl of watermelon on the counter. Good thing I had just swept. He is such an amazing eater. :)
I'm a happy camper. Feels like home.

Down Time

We have been so busy the past few weeks that we took a couple of down days and just chilled. Just hanging out at home. Mom came over for dinner one night.  Looks like we are getting some new neighbors. Guy is from the Deep South.  Love his accent.
We've been here for almost four months already. I still love it, but I am looking to the future. For now we are staying put, but eventually we will need a bigger space. In the meantime we will keep making it homey. Getting our gas BBQ grill tomorrow. My Home Depot card came. Got to like that.
I'm thinking about getting my car windows tinted. Since we are doing so many activities and I plan on a lot more, we are spending a lot of time in the car. Got an estimate for $180 and I have a $20 off coupon. That sounds much more reasonable than the $250 at the place Dave was going to have do it. I knew that was a ridiculous price.

New Skills

Cross training abounds. This week I got to learn how to do returns. The only part of the process I didn't do was the book pulls. The next day I couldn't even remember how I started. ;p I am sure I will get lots of practice. Next week will be filled with returns. New skills.

Planes, Trains, the River, and Us

We met up with Cassie again down at the river. Connor thinks it is the coolest place. There are planes and trains. There is the river to throw rocks in and get feet wet. He didn't know what to do at first when the water came up and covered his feet. There are people walking, jogging and riding bikes. There are dogs. And today there was food as we had a picnic in the grass. We saw a hawk, ducks, geese, and rabbits. It really is a nice place to spend time at. Audrie and Connor got to spend time with their mommy.

Back to Work

Looks like my two day work weeks are over again for awhile.  Sure enjoyed them though.  The littles and I got a lot of playground time and walking in.  This week brings three days to work, a permanent crown to be positioned, a river walk to take and lots of love.  I also have some calls to make.  Need to get Connor's insurance set with the right clinic.  He needs his 18 month check up at the end of the month and somehow SeaMar got set as his primary.  Life is always interesting.  :)

Blessings

I am so blessed with snot kisses and squishy hugs.
I am blessed with light and love from many places.
I am blessed with a son who misses me.
I am blessed with a job that works with me and my scheduling issues.
I am blessed with a great friendship with Kristie....always supportive.
I am blessed with a sense of community where we live.
I am blessed with the joy that David brings.
I am blessed with an expanding world.
I am blessed with great places to go walk and play.
I am blessed that for now Cassie is being part of the little kids lives.
I am blessed with the support of my family.

Super Saturday

The littles and I met up with David and Emma at the Farmers' Market. We perused the market and checked out the goings on in the park. It was the dog run for the humane society. We saw lots and lots of dogs and one ferret and one snake. David really dislikes snakes, but he was a good sport when I took the kids over to see it. Audrie petted lots of dogs and Connor got lots of kisses. And every trip to the market means time on the playground. Since Emma was with, Audrie also got to play in the fountain. We spent a good three hours there.
Once home, Connor took a nap and then it was out for more time at the playground at home. We stayed outside until it was bath time. I think they should sleep good tonight.

Son

Mike called. He requested that when he is done with treatment that we do a family activity. I told him I would take him and the littles to the zoo. He thought that was a fine idea. First time he has asked for that kind of thing. Maybe, just maybe, he has grown a tiny bit.

Zoo Day

The little kids and I picked up Cassie this morning and trekked over to the Oregon Zoo.  It was an absolute gorgeous day for a zoo walk.  We started off by Audrie losing her shoe when she was hanging on a fence looking at the train tracks below. It fell on a ledge but Cassie couldn't reach it.  A worker walked by and offered help.  She could reach it so Audrie had shoes at the zoo.  The kids had a blast.  Connor was enthralled with the animals.  They ran and ran and ran where we had our picnic.  And then we saw Lily the baby elephant.  She was incredible. Connor walked most of the way.  Amazing.  It was a great time.  We dropped Cassie back off in Vancouver, came home and the littles took three hour naps.  Wow.  They were beat.