A Letter

My life is mapped out.  I am staying here until it is time to move.  That happens when my mom moves.  And then I will live in her house.  At this point in time I don't ever intend to live with another man.  I won't rule it out, but it isn't planned.  I won't be married again.  I thought I would be married until I was old and always said I wasn't going to do that again.  I still feel that way, even though I'm not old now that my marriage is over.  And it's not that I didn't like aspects of marriage.

I just don't want to have to wash some guys clothes, cook for  him all the time, check with him before I do anything or make any plans, etc.  I like the freedom of doing what I want and when I want.  And we are always doing things.  

What I want is someone someday who wants to do things once in awhile that are just fun.  No entanglements.  I don't figure anyone wants to get too involved in my life and I want to keep it compartmentalized at least for a long while.  And right now I don't have the energy to get too involved in anyone else's life.  

And I don't see any of this happening for a long while.  The only person right now who could even come close to being that is George.  And he seems to think I want some great love affair or that I'm not worthy to be in his life.  Well so be it. I've had my great love affair with George and never even knew if he felt the same way.  That kind of relationship is way too hard.  I'm all about easy now. And while I will always love George, I can't prove to him that he is wrong.  And maybe he's not.  Just would have liked the chance to find out, but he never asked what I wanted or was looking for. So I guess he will be my facebook friend and we can play candy crush.  :p

So back to life and doing great things with the little kids.  BBQing tonight with the neighbors.  I love some things about apartment life.  :)