A Year

It has been a year since Dave died.  The little woman and I were talking and her memories are fading.  She no longer remembers riding on the sled in snow with Papa.  She no longer remembers living in Papa's house with Nana and Papa.  I expected the little man to be the one who forgot quickest because he was so much younger than her.  And maybe he has.  We haven't talked about it.  Maybe we will today when we reminisce about Papa.
Not a day goes by that I don't think about Dave, miss Dave, long for him to still be here with us.  And a year later it is no less strong than it was at the beginning.  I've just adapted to feeling that way.  Every once in awhile a little anger still presents itself, but I always remind myself that he was just a man.  And no man is perfect. 
He still sets a pretty high bar for anyone else who might want to be in our lives.  And there will be other people in our lives.  We don't live in a cave with no interaction with people.  But we can be choosy and pick people with integrity, character, honesty, connections, caring, etc.  Dave taught me a lot.  Mostly he taught me how to be by myself without him.  It was a painful lesson and one I hoped never to learn. But I did.
And so on this day a year later I still send light and love to him wherever he is.  I will continue to think about him, miss him and hold him dear in my heart as he was the man I chose to make my life with.  And now it is time to move on and make my life without him more than I already have. 
Feels like I am closing chapters all over the place this week.