And We Played

The weather was divine, so we headed over to Lewisville Park.  We actually took the dog with and she had a good time.  We always park quite a ways from the playground so we get a bit of a walk in first and after.
We spent about two hours there which felt like half an hour.  But the clock doesn't lie.  They played on the playground, met other dogs and played with sticks.  And then the little woman got cold.  No one believed me when I said it would be colder at the river.
Once home the little man and I continued on by playing outside.  He had his new nerf gun and he devised some rules as to whose turn it is.  Well he is a much better nerf shooter than I am.  He is a better hider than I am.  Probably because he is so much smaller and can hide in funny places like under the car. 
We ended the day with some chicken (tuna) hotdish and watching "Zootopia".  It was a very nice New Year's Eve day. 

Shopping

Finally had enough energy and motivation to finish picking up the living room and getting it vacuumed.  We had most of the Christmas stuff picked up, but it seemed like wrapping kept creeping out of corners.  And I was able to get the last of the boxes out.  I had to wait for the recycle bin to be emptied.
Then we spent a little time in the afternoon shopping.  The littles had "money" left from Christmas and wanted to spend it.  The most amazing thing was the shirt the little woman picked up. It was very fuzzy and she liked it and it looked great on her.  It was just a bit off white....which means it won't stay that way long.
The little man picked up a giant nerf gun with two barrels so it shoots 40 times and up to 100 feet.  He thinks it is pretty cool.  Hopefully he will do a little better and not get it taken away right away.  I have a nice collection of nerf guns to give back at some point.  ;p
And now on to the new year.  :)

It's Friday Right?

Woke up and had my coffee.  And that reminds me...my new contigo cups are too big to go under the Keurig.  Argh.  Anyway after drinking my coffee I realized the garbage and recycle didn't get taken out.  So I rush around like a chicken with its head chopped off.  Got my shoes, rounded up the last of the stuff to go in the cans and got them out.  I was amazed that the recycle truck hadn't come yet but was glad I made it.
Later in the day all the stuff is still there.  And it hits me.  Garbage and Recycle are coming on Saturday this week.  And while I thought it was Saturday when I woke up.....it's only Friday.
I love being sick.  I'm ready for it to all go away and get back to normal now.  ;p

No Talking Yet

I tell you what you don't do when you can't talk.  You do not, under any circumstances, yell at kids.  Oh that hurt.  And it may have contributed to still not being able to talk today.  Every once in awhile a little bit of voice would come through.  So I think I am starting to be on the mend.
The website about the flu said the illness can hang on for two weeks.  Hopefully not but if it does , I am asking for no more new symptoms. I haven't talked for five days already.  I don't feel bad.  I just have a remaining cough and I can't talk.  The littles did not get laryngitis.  That would have been funny.  ;p

No Talking

So I still have no voice.  And it is so weird to be at work and not talk.  I can't ask questions.  I can't contribute to any conversations.  It is just bizarre.  But I do manage to get in my zone and get all my work done.  I'm in charge of web orders this week and then the receiving.  We have a week and a half until Winter Rush.  Maybe I will be able to talk tomorrow. 

Glad

The littles never cease to amaze me.  Since this is my third rodeo I am doing things differently.  And I made that choice to do so.  I get each child four presents for Christmas and then their Santa gift.  I've already talked about Santa so you know there is no over the top gift coming from that direction.  I'm not the only one that gives them gifts.  So this year they actually ended up with nine plus one from Santa.  Nine is still a pretty good number. 
So we opened gifts yesterday and they were happy with each and every one.  I was not too sure how the little man's fancy clothes from Mommy or the underwear from me were going to go over.  Both were exclaimed over.  And when we were done opening presents there were no whines wanting more.  There were no tantrums of not getting what they wanted.  It was so nice and I was so proud of them. 
Maybe the way I am doing it is right.  We spent time from Thanksgiving till Christmas doing Christmas things.....PIR, looking at lights in neighborhoods, baking cookies, etc.  Christmas Eve was just about being together.  When it comes down to it it is the togetherness that is the longest memories. 
And yes, it makes me sad when I see others who get spoiled during the season.  And I have to remind myself about how I am shaping values for a lifetime. I could go into debt and create these over the top Christmas scenes, but I can't make myself do it.  I no longer feel the need to compete with others.  And I have to remind myself sometimes when I get sad.  The littles aren't sad. 
When I asked the little woman what her favorite gift was she immediately told me the small gift of little pet shop animals from Daddy. So for her it really is about the connections to each other. Reaffirms my decisions to go for the experiences and a few small presents. 

Horrible Santa

Wait...what?  I'm not trying to disrespect the fun of Santa Claus.  But sometimes you have to wonder.  The littles are in school so comparisons are going to be done.  That kid got some extravagant gift and this kid got a doll.  Where is the fairness in all of that?  I figured this is the year that the glimmer goes out on the myth.  I just expected it to be in a week when they go back to school.
Remember that my little man wanted an electric dirt bike.  And those start at about $200.  So no, Santa is not bringing that.  The little man and I had a talk about how Santa doesn't really do big gifts and he shouldn't.  So instead he wanted a remote control motorcycle.  A much more reasonable request.  The little woman never wavered from her desire for a Snackin Sara. 
So Santa came and brought a rc motorcycle and a Snackin Lily because Sara is a lot more money.  Santa brought an extra food/diaper pack with Lily to make up the difference.  Well the little woman was thrilled.  I don't think she even realized it wasn't Sara.  The little man is thrilled and it is all good. 
Where Santa becomes horrible is when he brought gifts to their little sister.  I don't have to deal with blatant inequality from other kids. I get plenty of it right here.  This is what Jazzlynn got.  And I don't begrudge her presents.  There is no way I can explain this to the little man who really wanted that dirt bike.  The argument I used to get him to change his mind just blew out the window.  Thanks Santa. 

Guess it is just about time to retire Santa in our house.  

Christmas Eve 2017

The day started off with snow which made me a liar.  I had told the little woman there would not be snow for Christmas.  She let me know I was wrong about that. So they dressed in their snow gear and headed out to sled in the half an inch of snow on the neighbor's driveway.  They had a good time.
And I can't talk.  What a turn this flu has taken.  I think we made a wise decision in going out for Chinese food.  I had went online and found out which restaurants would be open tonight and had good reviews.
We went to China Cook on St. Johns and it was lovely.  The best bbq pork we have eaten in a long time.  All the food was really good.  We will go back.  Mom seemed a little shocked at the bill.  $67 for five of us with two of us having a cocktail from the lounge, and an appetizer.  Very very reasonable.  I always forget that Mom is thinking it is a different year than it is.  ;p
We decided to go this route because of me being sick all week.  I have no oomph.  I couldn't find a movie for us to watch and I'm pretty sure Mom is beyond sitting through one anyway.  So Pat picked Mom up and we took her home.

The littles are now settled in watching "Wall-E."  Love that movie.

Life's Curve Balls

Not for our family today.  But what happened to others makes me appreciate what we have.  A gal I went to high school with and reconnected with at the reunion turns out to be sociable, personable, genuine and outgoing.  All those opposite personality traits from me (except I am genuinely me).  We became friends on facebook so I have gotten glimpses into her life.  Her father died this morning.  From all posts he must have been one hell of a man.  The little blip that you almost don't catch is that he had dementia. Naturally that is going to pull on one of my own heart strings.  Where her life is is where mine is going.  Lisa and I would have a lot to talk about.
While that was going on, Gabriel died.  About a year ago I had one of those little sidebar things showing groups that friends like trying to entice me to follow more groups.  Just a facebook thing.  So Nita and Traci were following or liked Gabriel's Giant Journey.  Gabriel was born with Weaver syndrome which is overgrowth to explain simply.  Then he a neuroblastoma, another heart string for me. He underwent many surgeries and chemotherapy's.  Just when they thought it was all good he got leukemia.  Leukemia can be a side affect from chemotherapy.  Gabriel is the son of one of Mike's good friends from back in the day before hard drugs.  Justin spent many hours in our company.  And so I watched from the sidelines as this family went through the last year of this horrible ordeal.  Gabriel turned seven this year.  Too young to have gone through all he went through.  Now he is at peace.
I send lots of light and love to these two families.  Their heartbreak must be crushing.  Life and its curve balls makes me appreciate that today we are okay.  Today we breathe, love, laugh and just be with each other.  I hope that Lisa and Justin find their own peace when they can.  They have big holes in their hearts that aren't ever going away.

For the Love of Cats

I love cats.  Always have.  When I was a kid I asked and was always told no.  My dad did not love cats.  He believed that cats only existed to live in barns and be mousers.  I did have a cat for a brief while when Dad didn't live with us and before we moved out west. It was so sad to leave that cat.
And then I didn't have a cat again until I grew up and lived with Dave.  I think Dave was a cat person also because we never had less than two cats it seemed.  We had dogs and we loved dogs, but we were cat people.
My brother is a dog person.  My sister is a dog person.  And then her daughter fostered these kittens.  Well one of those fuzzy orange and white kittens stole my sister's heart and he had a new home.  She is enjoying all the antics of a kitten.  Like all cats he likes small enclosed places.  He is a bundle of love.  My sister got so lucky the day she got him.

Yes That Happened

So two days of a mild headache left me believing that I had gotten past this flu bug without too much brouhaha.  Ha.  Woke up this morning to a horrible headache, coughing, etc.  Full blown.  Called work, called daycare and then tried to rest. 
Very hard to rest when the littles were feeling much better.  And they wanted to play and eat and just needed me to do things.  Oy.  Anyway I did get a nice couple of hours in the middle of the day.  But I know it wasn't enough to get over the top of this bug. 
The little man was the lucky one, like normal.  He had one real down day.  The little woman had two.  Here is hoping I only have two.  Christmas is coming up on us quick and we are not ready.  Guess it is what it is. 

Two Days

Two days down.  The little man is much better today.  The little woman is somewhat better.  She has been awake most of the day, but still just laying around on the couch or in bed.  I tried to take a nap.  That normally doesn't work that well with the littles and today was no exception.  My headache is a little worse today.
The little woman was suppose to have girl scouts tonight and they were going to perform their play.  I let the leader know this morning that the little woman was not going to make it.  Less than an hour later the notice went out that the play was postponed as half the girls had the flu.  Makes me wonder if we got it from one of them or if we gave it to them.  We may never know. 

Oy The Flu

We came home from work/daycare yesterday and the little man comments about his funny cough.  I just figured he was catching a cold.  They both felt a little warm, but maybe not....they like to snuggle under blankets and it always makes them warm.
Oh no.  We wake up today and they are both down for the count.  Cough, stuffy heads, sore throats, headaches, fever and achy limbs.  I was on board with colds till we hit the fever and aches.  Looked it up and the exact symptoms for the flu this year and it came on fast.  Just like it said online.  So I'm pretty sure they got the flu. 
Me, I've had a headache all day, but just a little one.  Still waiting to see.  Trying to remember if the little man got a flu shot when he got his vaccines for school.  We spent all day lazing on the couch and in bed.  Just where we needed to be. 
I'm at the point that what we didn't get done for Christmas, we just didn't get done.  Two different illnesses this month and a work schedule that had me working a lot just isn't conductive to getting other things done.  Thank goodness for online shopping. 

Betty's Chocolate

It's almost a tradition.  Every year we get Aunt Betty chocolate for Christmas.  Usually from Costco.  We've done the world chocolates and the ones coated in cocoa, and others.  This year I was doing my usual Costco run and they had a big bag of Ghirardelli peppermint bark.  Usually the bag is not that good of a deal, but this one was.  So I picked it up for Betty.  Score.
Ha.  I left it on the counter with the other Costco things...batteries for presents, socks for presents, etc.  Went to bed a little before the kids as they were watching a movie.  They came to bed and we went to sleep.  When we woke up the next morning, the little woman comments about the minty stuff I like.  Wait..what?  They had found the peppermint bark and proceeded to open it and eat a few.
After a deep breath I figured it was okay.  There is a lot in that bag.  Just means finding a new bag.  And it's all good. 
Then the little man found where I hid the rest.  He searches for the things he knows is here.  So it is sitting out and I just can't resist peppermint bark so I grab one out of the bag.  He sees me and informs me that those are for Aunt Betty.  Little whippersnapper.  It's still all good, but I don't know if Aunt Betty is getting any peppermint bark or not.  ;p

Pet Rats

So when I went to pick up the little woman from girl scouts last night, she insisted I come in and see Emily's pet rats.  And aren't they so cute?  No, they are rodents.  Now I always wanted a gerbil or a hamster when I was a kid.  Never got one.  My dad said no. Because they are rodents.  When I grew up and could have had any pet that I wanted, it seemed I wanted cats more than rodents.  And so it is.
Well the little miss thinks pet rats are now the coolest thing, but she seems to understand we won't be having one.  She wanted to know if she could have one when she is a grown up.  Yup, if she still wants one.
The whole time I am watching her with this rat I am thinking about our rat and our exterminator.  Maybe she doesn't quite understand that the exterminator is setting out bait to kill our rat.  I'm certainly now not looking forward to any kind of conversation about that.  That said...no new signs of our rat so maybe, just maybe, we finally did it in. 

Busy Day

The littles got into a help mode.  The little man made the bed and vacuumed.  The little woman helped pick up and got dressed for a party.  And then we were off to a birthday party at one of the local taekwondo studios.  They had a blast.  They broke boards, played balloon races and dodge ball.  They had pizza and cake.  It was grand.  I was very impressed with Master Oh.  He works very well with children. May have to check into lessons for the little man.  Have to give that a little more thought. 
After the party the little woman had to go to a special Girl Scout meeting.  They are getting ready to present a play at the assisted living place that they have their meetings.  So they needed time to get the set ready and practice. 
The little man and I went and picked up Grammy and went to Pat's for dinner.  He made lasagna.  We played Nintendo.  I haven't  played in a very long time and I still love it.  Probably a good thing we don't have a Nintendo game system at home.  ;p
Oh the topper of the day was the little woman decided she no longer wanted long bangs so she cut them.  She didn't do a horrible job and we will live with what she did.  Afterall it is her hair and her choice.  Just wished she would have said something and gotten a little help. 

Longer Day

The work hours were the same as yesterday.  The help was the same as yesterday.  And yet it seemed like a longer day.  I think because we still weren't as busy as I expected us to be.  When I left work on Wednesday we still had 1000 rentals to be returned.  I know we got no where near that many. 
Brenda and I got all the ones that came in processed, signs picked back up, deliveries made and a small amount of receiving.  I found a little bit of time to work on some freight logs.  It just felt like a really long day. Next week back to normal kind of hours.

Long Day

It was a long day at work today.  Liz is taking a long weekend.  It is the final two days of buyback.  It was suppose to be super busy.  It wasn't.  Brenda was able to complete a project for Monica while I kept up on the rental returns.  There was almost no receiving to do. 
That said....eight hours days are long whether I have to work hard or not.  Today would classify as a mid ground day for working.  We put on a lot of steps running back and forth to the buyback room and then putting the rentals we are keeping, back on the shelves. 
One more long day and then back to fours.  Until Rush in three weeks. Tomorrow we may pay for what we didn't get today.  Oy.

Bait Check

It's been a week since we laid the bait traps.  So Bill came back today to see how it was going.  The first trap he checked was outside.  He said as he came around the corner the stray orange and white cat went under the house.  If the cat went under it means there is no rats under there.  But no bait was ate. 
Then he came in to check the trap in the crawl space.  And it was gone.  Don't know about the bait.  The whole trap was gone.  Now it is too big to come out the vents so it is some place under the house, but not anywhere close to where he set it.  Weird.
So he set a new trap, again outside.  This time he is trying the other side of the house.  And he will come back in a week to check.  This week I have not heard a rat at all.  Here is hoping we got it. 

Family Holiday Dinner

Tonight was the holiday dinner where my mom lives.  The little man and I attended.  One of us ate and the other said he wanted McDonalds.  It was prime rib, potatoes au gratin, salad and green beans.  They served candy cane mousse for dessert.  It was a little too minty for my taste. 
Mom was glad we came and she seemed to enjoy herself.  Sitting there with her I realized (as I often do) how much I miss her.  There is still some of her there, but not like she was for most of my life.  Dementia is a  harsh disease. And all we can do is take it one day at a time and get through it. 
One of the other residents came and chatted at me.  I think it kind of made mom mad.  Afterwards she wanted to know what had transpired.   I told her the woman had thought I was someone else and then Mom was okay.  Said it was that danged dementia.  Yup.

Shopping

It was my one day off this month without the kids.  They are on winter break next week.  So my plan was to get the Christmas shopping done for them.  Or should I say for the little man.  I'm almost done with the little woman. 
And when I was done, I had gifts for my brother, my mother and the little woman and one little gift for the little man.  He is my difficult one this year.  I don't want to get him junk, but I don't want to get anything good that he will break too soon either.  It's a quandary.
So I tell him about not finding him anything and he gives me this look like I'm so stupid.  He then says he wants "toys".  Well duh.  I'm still in a quandary, but I'm sure I will get it figured out.  Two weeks and counting down. 
We also had a chat about the fact that Santa doesn't really do outlandishly expensive presents because it wouldn't be fair to other kids.  So he changed his mind from a dirt bike to a remote control motorcycle.  That may be doable. 

Daddy

Oy.  We learned a lot about visiting at Coyote Ridge.  You go get your ticket before you get in the car line to wait to go to the parking lot.  You don't get in the little offshoot, but park on the main driveway...That way you can bypass all those folks who arrived first.  It was amazing to me that we were the eighth car in line and yet we were one of the last ones processed through.  We arrived at 11:00.  We got back to see Mike about 1:15.  It is a lot of sitting and waiting for kids.  But as Mike said...this is probably the only visit to this facility.  He will be moving to camp in a couple of months.  Here is hoping that means Larch.
We spent a couple of hours visiting with him.  The littles had lots to tell him.  Then they played a couple of games with him and colored some pictures.  They took him to the play area and played for awhile.  And they all ate junk out of the vending machines.
Silly me left my card in the machine and then we started out.  Remembered inbetween "gates" and rushed back.  We got lucky and the card was still in the machine.  Otherwise some one would have scored a nice $35 to use on their visit in the machines. 
It was good seeing him.  He looked good and has put weight back on.  Like he always does when incarcerated.  The littles were so happy and I'm glad we spent the time and the money to make the visit happen.  And we did the drive back quicker than the drive up.  Must have been the wind. 

Christmas Came Early

Chad and the gang arrived bringing us lunch and gifts.  The little man got a great bike and he immediately showed off his skills at tricks.  This bike has pegs so the tricks are really going to start now.  He was so happy.  The little woman got a Shopkins Mall.  Chad and Gina helped her put it together and she is just thrilled.  And of course it had a nice box that made a toy for a bit also. 
We had a lovely visit.  I'm am very grateful to have them in our lives.
Then they headed to Portland....had a Blazer game to go to.  And we headed East.  Took a little over five overs to drive to Connell.  We had to stop and have dinner along the way.  Mostly it was a dark drive and we had some whipping winds from Troutdale to the Bonneville dam.   I was almost considering turning back around.  I could not imagine driving like that the whole way down the gorge.  But it stopped and we continued on. 
Our hotel was advertised as no frills and it really was.  Rather old, but it was clean and that was all we needed. 

Weekend

So Chad let me know that he and the troupe were coming down on Saturday to see the kids, if that worked with our schedule.  Well it does.  So we set it up for noonish Saturday.  That way I am still free to drive to Connell if that is what we decide to do.
When I told the little man they were coming, he was a bit upset.  Not that they were coming.  He thought it was going to interfere with seeing Daddy.  And that is very important to him.  I explained that both things can occur this weekend and he was fine after that. 
So this morning Gina texted me to get the wish list from the kids.  They were at Toys R Us shopping for the gifts.  The reason for the visit is to deliver the littles' birthday/Christmas gifts.  We are so blessed that they take time out of their lives to do this for us.  I gave them the list as I know it to be. 
Ky is the littles' biological uncle.  But Chad doesn't have to keep any kind of relationship between Ky and the littles if he didn't want to.  There is no legal relationship, but there is one of the heart.  And I can tell that family is important to Chad and he is showing that to Ky and by association the littles.  Maybe Chad is like me.  Family is important.  But I only put my best efforts into relationships that are appreciated, honored, blessed, and reciprocated.  Since Chad and Ky come down here, when we go north we try and stop to see them also.  Well that and we love Gina. 
I guess when it comes down to it.....all the strangeness of the situation still brought us great family who want us in their lives and we need them in ours.  So we are appreciative, honored, blessed and reciprocate as best we can.  We know we can never give to them what they give to us and it is okay.  It's just family and love.  And in another world Chad could have been their grandpa. 

And so I have decided to make the trip to Connell in two stages.  I just was not up to even the thought of nine hours in the car with the littles.  So I booked a hotel room and we will drive over after our visit with Chad, Ky and Gina.  That will put us at visitation in the early hours of it and then only a 4.5 hour drive home.  It's all good.  And we are all three looking forward to seeing Mike. 

Approved

Looks like the littles and I are going to prison to visit my son.  We started this process a good six months ago.  DOC was having heavy requests for visitation approvals.  And it took me awhile to gather the paperwork that I needed. I also had to get the no contact order dropped. I filled out the online registration for me, which was easy.  I filled out most of the registration for the littles but could not figure out where all the paperwork went.  Understand.....I have two different custody documents for the little woman.  I have guardianship paperwork for the little man and then more paperwork for his name change.  And of course their birth certificates and that was the easy part.
Almost three months later I was denied due to the charge that prompted the no contact order.  And then because I was denied the littles registrations were kicked out.  One of the criteria is who will bring them to visit.  The other was they still needed the paperwork I could not attach.  I was given an email address to complete their registrations.
On my denial, I was able to appeal.  And that took a good long while.  But this week I was given my exception and am now allowed to visit.  So I finished the littles' registrations using the email and I attached all 13 files.  I pointed out that I was now allowed to visit and I did not need a new form 20-441.
One day and the littles were approved for visitation.  Whew.  Mike got the notification of theirs before I did.  He called and wants us to come this weekend.  He hasn't seen his kids in a year.  And I know it is his choices that created this situation.  And I know that there are people who firmly believe that inmates shouldn't have any rights to see their kids, or drug addicts should not, or bad people should not.  I don't fall in that camp.  He is their daddy.  And they love him and he loves them.  And so we will make the trip.  It will be good to see him and when we see him he will be clean and sober and the best he has ever been.
Mike is my son and I have missed him also.  No matter what he has done, he is still my child and I love him.

Exterminator

Bill, the exterminator, came out and checked out my critter damage.  I have rats.  Plural.  Not a whole big family of them, but more than one.  So he set out a couple bait traps and filled some holes.  In a week he will come back and check the traps to see if enough bait got ate.  If so, he will close up the vents under the house that are missing the wire grills.  If not enough bait has been ate, we will wait another week. 
I'm just happy to be finally being proactive.  And Bill gave me some numbers of some contractors he knows who aren't out to overcharge people just because they can.  Yeehaw!

Lights and Leashes Dog Walk

It was a glorious night.  No rain, lovely moon.  Felt like Papa was watching out for us again.  We dressed in layers.  I had gotten some winter undergarments for playing in the snow so we used those.  We had gloves and hats and a huge soft scarf that passed around us.
We started off getting some dinner at Shari's.  Every one behaved.  And then we headed to PIR for the Lights and Leashes Dog Walk.  There are a couple of nights where you don't drive the PIR but walk it.  This is one and every one is welcome to bring their dog.  We opted not to bring our dog and just meet other folks' dogs. 
We estimated that each little met about 200 dogs and they were in their element.  They asked every time.  There were a few shy dogs but mostly just friendly people loving furballs.  The favorites seemed to be the little dogs.  Me, I like the big ones. 
The track is about two miles long and that is a long walk for kids.  But they did it.  I heard a couple complaints near the end but once we were back in the crowd everything was fine.  We lost a shirt along the way.  They got warm and took off jackets for a bit and the little man took off his shirt.  I was carrying it and have no idea when it got dropped.  The little man wanted to go back but I declined.  Who knows how far back it was and his legs were already a bit tired. 
It was a really good activity and they really liked it.  I think the dogs thrilled them more than the lights, but they did enjoy those also.  Another thing I have never done is marked off the list. 

One Day at a Time, One Step at a Time

Making some progress.  Finally finished phone tag with the exterminator.  He is coming out on Wednesday.  Connected with Travis.  Travis used to do contracting work but he is back to doing plumbing now.  So he is going to give me a couple of names and numbers of some guys for siding who are fair.  And then while I had him, I asked about the sump pump.  So later in the week he is coming out to take a look.   My best guest is something simple.  We shall see.  I told him I was too old to go under the house to check it.  He told me he wasn't a spring chicken either.  Ha.  I have a good ten years on him.  So my money trumps. 
But we are taking it all one day at a time and one step at a time. 
The rat has been making this crazy noise.  Found his hole that he just made.  Silly thing. 

Here We Go

It is rather amazing how quickly our diet can disintegrate.  We have essentially quit eating McDonald's.  Granted that is because of a YouTube video, but we will take it.  So we eat at home a lot more.  But it seems like a lot of processed food and a lot of sugar. 
So it was grocery shopping day.  And being aware means making a change.  So we did not buy the usual sugar products.  And I'm sure the complaints will come soon.  But we bought apples and grapes and strawberries.  The strawberries were gone by dinnertime.  Not unusual in that.  We usually buy them on grocery shopping day and they are usually gone by the evening. ;p
We had a complete meal for dinner and the first words out of the little man's mouth were "what are those green things? I'm not eating those."  He was referring to the green beans.  Little man you do not know what you are missing.  He did eat the chicken and the rice and the french bread.  I always find it amazing as to what they are willing to try and not try.
They wanted to try smoothies.  So I made them a smoothie.  Strawberry.  Oh no......not right.  So they each made their own.  With pineapple, strawberries and I'm not sure what else. Oh no......not right for any of us.  I give them props for trying though.  Even the little woman who hates everything. 
So we shall see if we can break the sugar addiction a bit. 

Dave

Three years.  I felt the tug on the heart strings when it was time for Dave to go.  Woke me out of a sleep and I don't believe I have ever felt those tugs before.  It's a connection that life, death, addiction, blame, dishonor or love could not ever sever.  Those heart strings held, but they were tugged and I knew he was going. 
The little man had just turned three when Papa died.  He just turned six.  He has lived half his life with and half his life without Papa.  Most memories have faded, except those we cling to with our videos and pictures. 
The little woman is eight and had more time and a longer bond.  And yet the memories fade for her also.  I find it sad, but they have this foundation that he helped lay for them. 
I still have moments when I am angry with him.  But not as much as before.  I have moments where I think of him with great love.  I wish he would have made different choices, but maybe he couldn't. 
There are people I can talk to and have fun with, but I doubt I'm ever going to find another connection like I had with Dave.  From the first moment we were able to talk about anything and everything and we did.  Some things not till the end, but we managed to hit everything we ever needed to talk about.  Maybe that connection is what blinded me to the alcoholism in the early years.  And maybe not.  I don't dwell on that too much, although it was a big part of our lives. 
I have great memories though.  All the work we did, the trips we took, the life we made.  And I still miss him every day, but life does go on.  And we honor him with our living. 
Light and love Dave.  Keep watch for us. 

From Family to Winter Wonderland

Busy, busy day.  After work I rushed home to collect the gifts for our family birthday party for the little man.  Then we headed to Hazel Dell to pick up Grammy and meet Pat at Round Table Pizza. The littles had a blast in the arcade room.  The little woman was so excited when she won a prize on the claw game.  The little man was happy with his new shoes, his nerf guns and his new game.
After dinner we took Grammy back and then hurried to school for the Winter Wonderland.  The kids made ornaments, decorated cookies, saw Santa and had snacks.  We saw many people we knew.  We did not win any of the raffles or door prizes.  The little woman was most disappointed about that. But it is what it is.  It is fun to want to win, but we can't win every time.
Now that we are done with the birthday celebrations, we can look forward to Christmas.