Always Bits and Bobs

Here is a picture of the little woman's cactus.  She just fell in love with them when we saw them. She liked that they weren't too pokey.
Yesterday was Jazzlynn's birthday.  I didn't forget, but I didn't really think about it much either.  She turned 4 years-old.  This morning we saw her birthday collage on facebook.  The littles were like "she's four?".  Yes.  Then the little man exclaims she is almost as old as him.  And then that was that.  I thought maybe after her birthday we might hear if she liked her birthday presents from her siblings.  They arrived a couple of weeks ago.  But alas, no word from them.  I am already at the point of not sending things to Cassie.  And I keep finding cool stuff.  But if you can't acknowledge what comes means you don't care much.  That being the case....I have to not care enough to waste my time.  But it was Jazzlynn's birthday and the littles needed to send presents.
Logan came to mow the yard.  The little man is down the street so Logan is mowing by himself today.  He commented that it wouldn't take so long today.  That is a true fact.  But Logan is part of our village now and I am great appreciative of him being so patient and teaching the little man about lawn mowers and mowing.

Ten Years

Happy birthday Blog.  Today marks ten years I have been blogging.  It has been an amazing journey.  I have a record of all the big things in our life and a lot of the mundane.  I have been accused of slander by someone who doesn't know the meaning of words.  He so obviously meant libel. 
In that ten years I have lost my spouse and best friend in more ways than one.  That is the biggest heartbreak that never heals.  I have gained two grandchildren that live with me.  I had great hopes that the parents would step up, but I knew in my heart that it wouldn't happen.  My mom has had dementia that entire ten years and that is another heartbreak that doesn't heal.  My son will always be an addict and hopefully someday in recovery. 
I have talked about living with alcoholism, addiction, co-dependence.  I have talked about dementia and its affects on the family.  I have talked about the trials and tribulations of home ownership, car ownership, having a job, having a renter.  I have talked about people who have come and gone.  My life is my own.  It is not a better life than anyone else's.  It is not a harder life than anyone else's.  It is the same and different.  There are many things in my life that continue to break my heart and there are many things in my life that make me grateful. 
Tens years of my story.  Wonder what the next ten years will bring?  On we go. 

What We learned

I'm probably going to butcher this, but I'm going to try anyway.  Not being Jewish and not being around Jewish people all the time....I had no idea.  A Bar Mitzvah is a very big deal.  It's not just turning 13 years-old.  Collin has been taking Jewish classes since he was in kindergarten and Hebrew classes since second grade.  Hebrew sounds hard to learn.  The Cantor who was one of the ones helping Collin the last year added up the time Collin had spent on his Bar Mitzvah.  156,700 minutes. He sung a song about it and that is why I can remember the count. 
The ceremony along with services lasted a bit over two hours.  We managed to sit pretty still the first hour and then had to go outside for awhile.  Then the little man wanted to go back in.  I was not sure we were ready so the little woman and I sat outside.  Then he came back out and informed us we could sit in front now.  Oh boy.  In he went back to the front.  When we went in he was squeezed in the front on the edge.  We sat back in the back where we were the first time.  Turns out the little man was sitting next to Collin's grandpa who did not mind in the least.
When the ceremony was done there was a nice lunch served.  Nathan had hired a game truck (who knew there was such a thing?) for the kids.  I lost mine for an hour and a half.  Quiet.  I sat and watched the people.  I watched Nathan and Stacy and Kyle, the grandpa, work the room.  I think Stacy's mom felt a bit out of place.  She is usually the hostess so she started cleaning up.  It was going to need to be done, but it seemed like she needed to do that.  Hard to explain.  She had no problems explaining just what she wanted when some of the others started helping her. 
Stacy let us have one of the centerpieces.  We took one of the cactus that the little woman loved when we walked in the room.  The little woman was ecstatic when she found out.  I was so reminded of how much we love Nathan and Stacy.  We need to make better efforts to get up there once in awhile. 

We had tried to hook up with Chad and Gina.  But it turns out they were out of town for the weekend.  Chad had suggested we still stop in and see Ky.  Now I wasn't too sure.  Ky is a teenager and I just didn't figure he would want to spend part of his "free" weekend with little kids.  I was wrong.  I got a text at the Bar Mitzvah asking what time we might be showing up.  So after we were done at the Temple, we headed over to visit with Ky.  We met his new puppy, Shadow.  Shadow has a great face.  Almost as lovely as Raina who belonged to Heather.  And that is immediately where my mind went when we met  Shadow.  The kids played with Shadow and Ky.  I visited with Ky's grandma who lives next door to Chad.  We had some things in common and no one to interrupt us. It was a nice visit.  Glad Ky texted and wanted us to come. Maybe next time we won't pick a weekend when Chad and Gina are gone. ;p
We hit a McDonald's on the way out and then the long drive back down.  Traffic was pretty light.  It was a nice break in our routine. 

And We Were Off

After school and basketball skills it was time to head north.  But first we had to get pizza from Little Ceasar's and gas.  I don't know how I missed the gas earlier in the day.  So we got the pizza in BG and stopped in Woodland for the gas.  We sat in the parking lot while I ate my pizza.  And then the long drive.
Now the drive to Tacoma really isn't a long drive.  We just did that drive to Connell and back in one day a couple of weeks ago. And we used to drive to Wenatchee and back in one day.  Those were long drives. 
I picked a hotel that was not easy on, easy off the freeway.  And my GPS had quit working a couple of trips ago.  So that meant stopping and using the GPS on the phone.  We were so close.  Just had to drive around the Tacoma Mall.
We met a little girl named Raelynn who played elevator operator every time we went up.  So funny the last time.  She had to come back to our room because she said she couldn't remember if she was suppose to go up or down. 
We settled in.  Tomorrow is a big day with the Bar Mitzvah.

RIP Jeannie

Death always seems to come in waves of threes.  So this week I have a second already.
My old neighbor died today.  She had been ill for a long time.  Tired.  She, too, had lived an extraordinary life.  She might have disagreed with that.  She did what she had to do to survive and raise her children.  She had seven.  One predeceased her years ago and that was a great heartache for her.  I can't remember now how many grandchildren she had, but boy did she love them.
She had stories of love, laughter, children, jobs and alcoholic life.
The best piece of advice she ever gave me was if I ever felt comfortable with a man to run as fast as I could.  She told me the relationships that were hard and uncomfortable were more likely going to be healthy.  We were kindred spirits Jeannie and I. 
I mowed for her for many years.  Her kids didn't want to do it.  And yet at least one of them would tell me I was doing the gravy job.  Maybe so.  But I was there doing it all the time.  And that left her kids to do that "man" work.  When I moved to town Dave took over.  Until he needed me to fill in.  Funny how that worked.  And then once Dave was gone...Jeannie's kids had to mow again.  Maybe there was a grandchild by then willing to do it.  Anyway we had great conversations when I was done and her "field" looked better. 
RIP Jeannie.  I will never forget all the stories or the great advice.  I know wherever you are you are kicking ass and laughing, always a true word coming from your mouth.  Light and love lady. 

Lessons

We startled the neighbor.  He was washing his truck.  After a few minutes he asked the little man if he wanted to help.  Little hands can get in those wheel spaces easier than big hands.  And so the little man spent a good half an hour helping.  Getting taught and coached.  They had a big conversation.  And the little man got better as he went along.  I did notice the hose had to be taken away though....too much fun to spray people. 
I am so thankful for those in my village willing to teach the little man something.  There is this whole bunch of guy kind of stuff that I just don't know.  Yes I can give a car a bath, but my job isn't going to look anything like the guys next door.  He was doing wheel wells and tires, etc. 
The little man loves spending time with men who take him under their wing and talk to him and teach him things.  I love it too.  Thanks Drew, you really fill in some blank holes for us.

Jane

Megaera came in for break when I was on break.  She asked me if I knew Jane.  Pretty much every one knows Jane.  She is like a staple at the college.  Liz said she worked there for awhile.  I saw her every Rush for years and years.
We always talked and she had the most wonderful stories.  One day I was carrying a box that was too heavy to carry very far so I sat on a bench and she was working her way to the bookstore from her home across the street.  She, too, needed a break.  So we sat and conversed as long as I could sit there.
Jane was or would be 82 this year.  And over the years I had watched her go from this very spry older lady to a much more fragile one.  The last time I saw her she was using one of those walkers you can take a seat in.  Megaera said she was in a wheelchair the last time she saw her.
Jane got ill and went on hospice last week.  She died Sunday.  The world lost this great light that shown so exquisitely.
So it turns out she had married a much younger man.  And that explained her complaint about him not looking too hard for a job.  I, naturally assumed he was about her age and was kind of amused.  Now I understand the angst.  He was husband number 2 or more....I only know about two.
The first husband was french and they lived in Switzerland.  She was a Swiss housewife for about twenty years and he was the love of her life.
Her family was involved in the library of congress and she had great library stories.
RIP Jane.  You had a great life and I can only hope that I have half the stories you do.