Outside, Inside

Fight or flight can take many many forms.  It is part of anxiety.  Let me tell you anxiety encompasses a whole lot of things.  But right now our thing is fight or flight.  Now both kids suffer from it.  One fights and one flies.  The one who fights really causes the other to fly.  And then she flies even when there is no threat.  It is part of anxiety. And part of an enlarged hippo campus that both kids have.
After the little woman started therapy she opted to stay outside most of the time.  I don't know if it was therapy or just something she latched on to and did.  She would get home from school and stay outside until the little man went to bed.  She goes to friends' houses to play.  She sits on the step coming in and plays on my phone, reads, draws pictures, etc.  It is how she feels safe.  I did try to make her come in one day.  Picked her up and carried her in.  And as I did it I realized it was totally wrong.  It was the same as restraining the little man.....only escalates the feelings of fight or flight.  About that time I had an appt. with her therapist and she said to leave her be. If she wants to run, let her.  And I can't make her come inside and stay.  My therapist agreed with that assessment.
Now there have been times that that has wreaked havoc on my life.  Like the day she decided she also could not ride in a car with her little brother. That day was almost a panic attack and she showed it to many people who then wanted to know why she was so afraid.  My answer of anxiety.....does not satisfy a single person.  I guess you have to live it to understand it.  Her being outside seems to be part of a problem for one of my neighbors, who called CPS about it.  It's just one thing after another.  And we are doing the best we can and what we can.
Slowly a change has been occurring.  She is coming in a little earlier.  Even into the bedroom with us if we are watching a movie.  And then today....she stayed inside almost all day.  And when she was outside it was because he was also.  They played.  Now understand the door has to not be latched, but at least it can finally be almost closed.  She can ride in the car as long as her door is not locked.  I don't know what tomorrow will bring, but today was a good day.
And then a little side note....while we were outside watching the little man play with his new RC, the neighbor who has the problem came outside and watched us.  She tried to make it look innocent, but when you are standing there watching instead of carrying that blanket inside with you...you are watching.  No reason to call the cops today.....course there never really is a reason for her to do that, but she does anyway.