We are back on safe ground. Dave is back in recovery and going to meetings. His surgery helped his back and his mood has improved from that. He is working on being here. So I am staying here. I think that when I told him how close I was to leaving, it was a wake up call.
I never wanted to leave. This is my life and this is the space I created to live it in. I love my home. I love Dave. But I was not going to stay in an ugly household. I don't deserve that and was ready to make a change if I had to.
I am quite happy that for now I do not. It is always one day at a time. There is a reason for that saying in the AA world. And while I expect the ups and the downs, I will not tolerate the ugliness anymore. Nor should the little kids have to.
So now we look for a truck. And maybe replace a couple of things....like the bbq and the gazebo.
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